Wonderful books by Father Kinsella:
The Wife Desired
The Man For Her

Although sex is an important aspect of marriage, yet it is really a 
small part. Especially is this true in the marriages where all is well 
as regards sex. The companionship of marriage is what brings the 
real fullness of peace and contentment to a couple. And after all, 
peace and contentment are the real day in and day out ingredients 
of happiness.56096b53043a041210b7c56e232ae0cc

The full flaming moments of ecstasy of love, rocketing a soul into 
the very presence of God, are few and far between for the average 
mortal. These moments are cherished as a glimpse of eternal 
things to come. Now we have not even the capacity to long endure 
them.

A human being is not very self-sufficient. A person needs others to 
fill the emptiness of his own being. Husband and wife fill this 
need for each other. They complement each other in this manner 
much more even than they do in any physical sense.

There is something beautiful about the companionship of man and 
wife as it bridges the years. Especially is this true for those who 
have kept something of the chivalry of the first days of their love.

Familiarity does not have to breed contempt. Perhaps it does 
among savages. The natural, easy familiarity between man and 
wife, springing from their daily companionship can easily remain, 
and does in very many instances, a fine influence in their lives.

All wives appreciate the little courtesies of respect and esteem 
from their husbands. Some do nothing to promote this attitude on 
the part of their husbands. A lady will receive attention, and 
courtesy if she merits it, and if she is gracious enough to 
acknowledge the efforts of the male.

By nature a man has a deep-seated sense of respect, of chivalry for 
the lady. It does something for him to manifest this feeling. It 
helps to make him a better man.

At an early age, I was somewhat disillusioned about the female in 
this matter of chivalry. During high school years I rode the "El" in 
Chicago during the morning rush hour. I shall never forget my first 
efforts to be courteous with the female passengers. I was almost 
trampled to death. It was impossible to show these women any 
deference. They had become callous. For them life was a matter of 
dog eat dog. They shoved and gouged and grabbed any preference 
before a man could offer it to them. A man on the "El" during the 
rush hour had about as much opportunity to be chivalrous as a 
polite hog at a trough has of getting in a bite.

I have often wondered what kind of wives those little ladies 
became. Perhaps they were tired or confused at being thrown into 
the vortex of the economic struggle for survival. In a saner world 
they would have been at home, where the true nobility of their 
lives could find its proper environment for growth.

Intelligent couples never take each other for granted. Of course 
there is a natural easiness and relaxation in each other's company 
shutting out any stiffness or lack of intimacy. The bright husband 
will never relinquish the prerogative of being a gentleman. 
Thoughtfulness is his watch word. A kindness here and a 
consideration there go a long way to promote companionship with 
his wife. The opening of a car door for her, helping her with her 
coat, seating her at table, these and a dozen other little actions 
evidence his tenderness for her. She is precious to him, so he 
surrounds her with attentions.

What wife could be so dull as not to yearn for such interest? Then 
she makes an unobtrusive but very real effort to keep for her 
married life the chivalry of her days of courtship.

Many married couples never lose the evidence of chivalry and 
romance of their days of courtship. Actually all their married lives 
they court each other. So blessed with this disposition they walk 
through life leading each other to their eternal reward in loving 
companionship.



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