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Category Archives: by Leane Vdp

2023 ~ A Fresh Start, A New Book

02 Monday Jan 2023

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp

≈ 4 Comments

As we begin our journey through January, the New Year is like a fresh book with 365 blank sheets of paper. A beautiful volume….a book just waiting to have its lines filled.

These sheets have possibilities…incredible possibilities that, when filled with worthy and noble, sincere and optimistic ideals, can result in a growing of character, an increasing of knowledge and a deepening of faith.

What will we write on each of our pages this year?

What are the things that will help us to grow in our vocation this year? What decisions do we have to make in order to become a better woman, wife and mother? These are the things we want to write in our 2023 manuscript. They don’t have to be big changes….not at all. In fact, it is those small things, repeated every day that will make the difference at the end of the year.

Aristotle says, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”

3 Suggestions to Help us Inscribe Worthily in Our Books This Year:

Number 1:

Out with the bad and in with the good…

We have had so much sickness within the family these past two months. The grandchildren have really struggled.

So…with the weather being quite mild the last couple of days, a lot of us have opened up our windows to let the germs and bad air OUT…and the good air IN!

Why not, for this year, then, let us open up the windows of our minds to let IN the fresh air of good reading, good sermons, uplifting websites, etc.

Let the germs and stench OUT by refraining from filling our minds with an overdose of politics, in the church and outside of it. Or whatever else that brings us down in spirit and is not necessary for our daily life.

Then, come December 2023, we can look back and see that we have grown in our character and in our faith! It’s the little decisions each day that will make this change come about.

Number 2:

Can we  go to daily Mass more? There is nothing more powerful, more healing, more problem-solving than attending Mass and receiving Our Lord. He IS the problem-solver!

Do we want more peace, more joy, more love in our hearts? Let’s go to Mass, there to receive Jesus in the Holy Eucharist.

Do we want our  longings to be fulfilled? Let’s make our way to Mass! Remember when you do, you may not see the results right away, and certainly you may not feel them, but they will be there….and you will notice.

We may not be able to make it to Mass. I know what it was like raising a large family. Then let’s  take the time to make a Spiritual Communion, more than once a day! It is very efficacious and gives much grace! You can read this post here on the efficacy of a Spiritual Communion.

St. Thomas Aquinas once defined a Spiritual Communion as “an ardent desire to receive Jesus in the Most Holy Sacrament and in lovingly embracing Him as if we had actually received Him.”

You can “turn toward the Holy Tabernacle” and receive Jesus in your heart from anywhere you might happen to be, at any time, day or night!

Here is a Spiritual Communion:

My Jesus,
I believe that You are present in the Most Holy Sacrament.
I love You above all things, and I desire to receive You into my soul.
Since I cannot at this moment receive You sacramentally,
come at least spiritually into my heart.  I embrace You as if You were already there and unite myself wholly to You.  Never permit me to be separated from You. Amen.

And let’s remember to call on the name of Jesus throughout each day as discussed in the last post.

Number 3:

We don’t need to add prayers if we already have a spiritual schedule set in place, but we can always work on being more diligent in saying the prayers we already say. Let’s eliminate distractions, if we can….and then patiently embrace those distractions that we can’t eliminate. We must just keep trying to authentically lift our hearts to God as we say our prayers. God sees our efforts!

Will there be  things this year that we find bigger than we can control? Will we have problems that are too much for us?

These will be the very opportunities to rely on Him who will come and more than meet us half-way. A faith of a mustard seed….that is all we need. Let us ask God for it…every day this year! Do we realize the peace we would have if we truly believed!? Well, then let’s ask for it!

We can only live our life one day at a time. Things may happen to us this year that are so painful or confusing that we need to just live one hour at a time, maybe one minute, reminding ourselves that God sees everything, that He loves us and that He is the answer. And as my mom has reminded me, “All things are passing….”

Let us lean on Him this year more than ever, bringing every problem  to Him for He will show us the way to go.

And let us remember this powerful Serenity Prayer:

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference” Amen!

By the end of the year, when we pick up our 2023 volume which will be filled, will we shudder with regrets…..or sigh with humble satisfaction? It’s up to us.

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winter-finerfem-quote-for-the-day

“Out of these many traits let us together choose the ideal woman. First of all, she should be earnest and sincere. Our truly ideal woman will not be silly or frivolous, nor will she be guilty of actions that appear vulgar or unwomanly. She must always have a kind word for others—not a person who will unjustly criticize behind your back. Her clothes are womanly and becoming. She will be known for the beauty of her character rather than the richness of her clothing or ornaments.” – Mabel Hale, Beautiful Girlhood, 1922

Penal Rosaries! Penal rosaries and crucifixes have a wonderful story behind them. They were used during the times when religious objects were forbidden and it was illegal to be Catholic. Being caught with a rosary could mean imprisonment or worse. A penal rosary is a single decade with the crucifix on one end and, oftentimes, a ring on the other. When praying the penal rosary you would start with the ring on your thumb and the beads and crucifix of the rosary in your sleeve, as you moved on to the next decade you moved the ring to your next finger and so on and so forth. This allowed people to pray the rosary without the fear of being detected. Available here.


The book is filled with wonderful advice on how to live a happy life… Available here.

Here is a complete guide to mature, responsible, even noble behavior in our complex modern society. Written in the 1930s by a wise Jesuit priest and steeped in the wisdom of the ages, these pages teach the timeless principles that have led countless souls to true success and lasting happiness…. Available here.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

Living Advent and Christmas With Intention

01 Thursday Dec 2022

Posted by Leanevdp in Advent/Christmas, by Leane Vdp, FF Tidbits

≈ 2 Comments

A throwback and a reminder….

Here we are, with Christmas around the corner. Busy times are ahead!

This is our reminder to stop and smell …. the evergreens and the cinnamon along the way!

Our traditions and customs are important. My daughter, Theresa and I made a video last year about all the Advent Customs we do in our homes. They keep us busy! And, in the last couple of weeks things will ramp up with baking, wrapping gifts, decorating our home and tree, etc. These things ARE important…after all, Jesus, Our Lord, is coming! Oh yes!

In this hubbub, I want to remind you (and me) of something my mom drove home to me over the years….that “people are more important than things”…and schedules…and work, etc.

One time my mom was in the attic with her mom, my Grandma. Grandma was going through an old trunk that had some special “treasures” kept through the years. Grandma’s family was poor; they had nine children and lived in an old farmhouse. Grandma’s eyes began to fill with tears as she stroked a piece of pretty material found in the timeworn chest.

She said, “I wish I had given this material to your sister when she asked for it years ago. I thought I would use it some day…it was too pretty to hand over to her. She wanted so bad to practice her sewing. And now she is married and moved out…and I missed that opportunity.”

It was just a little thing…but a great lesson to remember….

Don’t lose sight of the people you love. Don’t put them on the back burner.

In the past year I have been very much reminded of this. Last year, close to this time, my brother, Steve, was found in his trailer, passed away. That was very hard….and my other brothers and I regretted the words unsaid and the phone calls that should have been made in spite of Steve’s past mistakes.

A year later my mom, as you know, left us. Another blow. One that has left a great hole in our lives.

I know you all have felt different tragedies in your own lives.

We never know the time nor the hour when one of our family or friends will be called. Not that we are to live in fear…but this is a reminder…let’s live with intention….and don’t take your loved ones for granted among the busy-ness of the season!

Enjoy the little things in life because one day you will look back and realize they were the big things.

You will never have this day again. You will never cross this moment of time again. Use it wisely.

What are some little ways you can make this a reality?

Stop what you are doing and greet your husband when he comes home, listen to him even if you’re busy with holiday preparations.

Have dinner ready, if you can. Let him know he is special.

Look and listen, really listen, when your child is talking to you.

Read them a Christmas bedtime story…make this a habit.

Let them bake cookies with you…in spite of the mess and the fact that it would be easier to do it on your own. What child doesn’t like to sit on the counter, legs dangling, while holding the mixer or cracking the eggs!? (Be ready to fish out the eggshells!)

Train yourself to see the positive in those you rub shoulders with each day. It will have its effiects, I guarantee!

Do you have an elderly parent you need to spend time with? Do it! Do you have a difficult sibling that you find it hard to be kind to? Be kind!

Yes, we will do our baking, our wrapping, our tree….but let’s not get too wound up! Let’s not take on so much that we are totally stressed out. Not worth it.

Fr. Jacque Philippe:

“I often say jokingly that the ladder of perfection has only one step: the step we take today.

Without concerning ourselves about the past or the future, we can decide to believe today, place all our trust in God today, love God and neighbor today.

Whether our good resolutions produce success or failure, next day we can begin again, not relying on our strength but only on God’s faithfulness.”

Life happens in the moments. If we take on way too much we get frustrated. Then the daily things…reading a story, wiping a nose, listening to others, is done begrudgingly.

Remember these little things are the ones that make memories, create atmosphere and build relationships.

One last thing from St. Francis de Sales (who doesn’t love this quote?!)

“Be patient with everyone, but above all with yourself…do not be disheartened by your imperfections, but always rise up with fresh courage.”

Advent is a new season of the Church. Every time we pick ourselves up, it is a new season. Don’t ever get discouraged.

So…this Advent and Christmas live with intention. And remember, Ladies, that your life as a homemaker is very important. And your joyful presence in the home is more important than any of the presents under the tree!

Each day is a chance to grow in virtue and it begins with the little things. Show your husband you care…listen to him, smile at him, give him a hug when he doesn’t expect it. Your children are watching and courtesy and love are contagious! This Advent can be special…. it starts with you! -Finer Femininity

        Little Lady’s Charming Crocheted Party/Church-Going Hats!

Your little special lady will look charming in this beautiful handcrafted Crocheted Hat! Every flower, petal and bow is hand made with care. The unique combination of colors will add the final touch of elegance to your little girls outfit! Available here.

Our attitude changes our life…it’s that simple. Our good attitude greatly affects those that we love, making our homes a more cheerier and peaceful dwelling! To have this control…to be able to turn around our attitude is a tremendous thing to think about!
This Gratitude Journal is here to help you focus on the good, the beautiful, the praiseworthy. “For the rest, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever modest, whatsoever just, whatsoever holy, whatsoever lovely, whatsoever of good fame, if there be any virtue, if any praise of discipline, think on these things.” (Philippians 4:8 – Douay Rheims).
Yes, we need to be thinking of these things throughout the day!
You will be disciplined, the next 30 days, to write positive, thankful thoughts down in this journal. You will be thinking about good memories, special moments, things and people you are grateful for, lovely and thought-provoking Catholic quotes, thoughts before bedtime, etc. Saying it, reading it, writing it, all helps to ingrain thankfulness into our hearts…and Our Lord so loves gratefulness! It makes us happier, too!
Available here.



Women historically have been denigrated as lower than men or viewed as privileged. Dr. Alice von Hildebrand characterizes the difference between such views as based on whether man’s vision is secularistic or steeped in the supernatural. She shows that feminism’s attempts to gain equality with men by imitation of men is unnatural, foolish, destructive, and self-defeating. The Blessed Mother’s role in the Incarnation points to the true privilege of being a woman. Both virginity and maternity meet in Mary who exhibits the feminine gifts of purity, receptivity to God’s word, and life-giving nurturance at their highest.

You’ll learn how to grow in wisdom and in love as you encounter the unglamorous, everyday problems that threaten all marriages. As the author says: If someone were to give me many short bits of wool, most likely I would throw them away. A carpet weaver thinks differently. He knows the marvels we can achieve by using small things artfully and lovingly. Like the carpet weaver, the good wife must be an artist of love. She must remember her mission and never waste the little deeds that fill her day the precious bits of wool she s been given to weave the majestic tapestry of married love.

This remarkable book will show you how to start weaving love into the tapestry of your marriage today, as it leads you more deeply into the joys of love.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

My Little Story About the Rosary/Esther Update/And the Winner Is….

07 Friday Oct 2022

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp, Spiritual Tidbits, The Rosary

≈ 14 Comments

Tags

advent journal, Christmas Novena, Rosary

🌻🌻🌻🌻

What a beautiful feast day…..The Feast of Our Lady of the Holy Rosary!

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I thought I would repost this today:

Here is my little story of the Rosary…..

I’m a slow learner.

Sometimes it just takes me a long time to “get” some things.

At the tender age of twenty, the Rosary and the Consecration to Our Lady (St. Louis de Montfort style) was what set my feet on solid ground in a world that spun around me with all sorts of “answers” to life’s problems. And I wanted answers.

My friends were leaving the Catholic Church that was rocked by liberalism and they were going to greener pastures. It was all beckoning to me. The Catholic Church I attended didn’t seem to hold out any answers. I had attended a Catholic School and went to Mass every Sunday all my growing up years. I was involved in youth groups and church choirs. And yet I didn’t know about the True Presence until I was almost 20 years old! There was an emptiness…. but I didn’t know what the problem was.

Then something happened. I went to a few classes on St. Louis de Montfort’s True Devotion to Mary. I didn’t like them but I stepped out in faith and began by saying a decade of the rosary each day (while my thoughts traveled to those naysayers saying  “repetition of words are useless…dumb”….they also said…”IDOLATRY…you can’t pray to Mary”) but I persevered…..And then I consecrated myself to Our Lady…(once again, the horrible doubts and misgivings…) I did it anyway. It was not very comfortable.

I met hubby. We began our courtship and our marriage with the rosary…daily. It was a commitment. It wasn’t wonderful…or beautiful…. It was a commitment.

We had children. Many children. We said the rosary. So often, it seemed fruitless. Life was so distracted, so wrought with the everyday little crosses and duties…but it was a commitment and we stuck to it.

I knew it was a good thing. I knew Our Lady asked for the Family Rosary at Fatima:“I am the Lady of the Rosary. Continue to always pray the Rosary every day.” I believed. I was committed. Hubby was always committed. 🙂

I see now the fruits. I look around at a very crazy world and thank God through tears for what He has given to us…through no merit of our own.

I know that we could have really messed up. We were two people coming from very different backgrounds….both very strong-willed. We made our mistakes…..but we had the Rosary. And we stuck with it, day in and day out, year after year.

A family that prays together, stays together. I know that is not everything. If we have an open heart, the Rosary gives us the graces to make the necessary changes as we need them.The Daily Family Rosary. Steady, Constant. Amid the crosses of daily life with many children, the misunderstandings between husband and wife, the financial burdens…we had the rosary.

When the kids got hurt or sick, when I was very ill, when hubby was in the hospital and we had no money to pay, through tragedies, accidents and fires, when I didn’t understand why God was letting things happen to us…. we were saying the Rosary.

Steady and constant, we prayed it every day, amid slouching kids, tired husband, cranky, pregnant wife.

Thank God for that Rosary. I know my life is not done yet. We still have children at home, children who can….and will….make a lot of mistakes. But for the record, they all (married ones, too) put their Faith first, amid their own struggles. They say the daily Rosary and it will be what holds them together through thick and thin.

If you have troubles, say the Rosary. If, amid your noisy and boisterous family, you are suffering loneliness, say the Rosary. Do you have fears and worries? Say the Rosary. Are your rosaries dry and distracted?…Keep saying it.

Truly, who knows better than Our Lady, Our Mother, our humanness, our failings, how small we are, how distracted we are. She will help. Persevere. Don’t give up.

It is just now that I am beginning more to understand the beauty, the mystery, the  deep, interior, spiritual growth that can take place through the Rosary. Like I said, I am a slow learner.

I am glad that God is very, very patient.

He has given us a very special gift. Don’t take it for granted and don’t go a day without saying it!

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The Annunciation “Hail, Full of Grace”

Another day had begun in the little home of Nazareth – a quiet, cool March day. Mary would spend it as she had spent countless others, quietly working about the house.

An ordinary girl, Mary, as the world judges; ordinary like the rest of the villagers, like Joseph…

Suddenly an angel was by her side: “Hail, full of grace!“

An ordinary person would be rather disturbed by such a visitor, and by such a greeting. And Mary was! “She was troubled at his word.“

The angel had implied that Mary loved God with all her heart, soul, mind, strength; that she loved God enough to become His Mother.
Loving God wholeheartedly – like Mary, I was created to do just that – and being “ordinary“ puts no barriers in my way!

🌻🌻🌻  WINNER!  🌻🌻🌻

And now…

🌻🌻🌻

Congratulations Ashley! I have sent you an email!

🌻🌻🌻

“It is difficult for a child to be better than his home environment or for a nation to be superior to the level of its home life. In fulfilling its double purpose – the generation and formation of children – the home becomes a little world in itself, self-sufficient even in its youngest years. It is vital that you, as a mother or father, make of your home a training ground in character-building for your children, who will inherit the world’s problems. Home is a place in which the young grow in harmony with all that is good and noble, where hardship, happiness, and work are shared.” – Father Lawrence G. Lovasik

Esther Update:

Esther is at home. She continues to have breathing difficulties and Jeanette puts her on some oxygen at night, depending on how low it dips. She has taken her to some specialists and so far they have no answers.
💛💛💛💚💚💚 Mike and Jeanette are deeply grateful for your prayers.
We all are! 💛💛💛💚💚💚
Below is a photo of Esther covered with a lovely blessed baby blanket that a dear lady from the blog sent to Jeanette. 

Rosie is Esther’s Godmother

Christmas St. Andrew Novena, Wire-Wrapped Chaplet With Prayer Card. Available here.

Advent Package Special! The Catholic Mother’s Traditional Advent Journal & Celine’s Advent

 Available here.
Available individually here.

Details

The Catholic Mother’s Traditional Advent Journal:
Advent is such a special season! And you are about to make it more meaningful than you ever have!
This Advent journal is for busy moms who need a little help making this season special within the home. It will help you stay on track and be consistent with the customs you have decided to incorporate within your four walls.
I have broken it down into bite-sized tidbits that, when laid out for you, will be easy to accomplish. As you check each item off you will get a sense of fulfillment knowing you are getting done what is truly important in this expectant season! The other things will get done….but first things first!
At midnight, on Christmas Eve, when Baby Jesus arrives, you and your family will look back upon your Advent and sigh with satisfaction, knowing you truly have celebrated with the Church, that you have put your best foot forward in making this a spiritual, enchanting, holy time for all!
The first few pages of this book will have a run-down of the special Advent customs and activities that will be on your checklist each day. They are simple, they are doable.
I hope this Advent is more special than ever as we walk hand-in-hand making the Liturgy come alive in our homes!

Celine’s Advent:
Take a walk through Advent as Celine and her family prepare for the coming of the Baby Jesus at Christmas! You will enjoy celebrating the beauty of the season with Celine as she helps her mom with the special traditions and activities that make the liturgy come alive in their home! Her “peanut gallery” consists of a mouse named Percy and some charming and delightful Christmas Angels! They are sure to capture your heart!



Sav

Women historically have been denigrated as lower than men or viewed as privileged. Dr. Alice von Hildebrand characterizes the difference between such views as based on whether man’s vision is secularistic or steeped in the supernatural. She shows that feminism’s attempts to gain equality with men by imitation of men is unnatural, foolish, destructive, and self-defeating. The Blessed Mother’s role in the Incarnation points to the true privilege of being a woman. Both virginity and maternity meet in Mary who exhibits the feminine gifts of purity, receptivity to God’s word, and life-giving nurturance at their highest.

You’ll learn how to grow in wisdom and in love as you encounter the unglamorous, everyday problems that threaten all marriages. As the author says: If someone were to give me many short bits of wool, most likely I would throw them away. A carpet weaver thinks differently. He knows the marvels we can achieve by using small things artfully and lovingly. Like the carpet weaver, the good wife must be an artist of love. She must remember her mission and never waste the little deeds that fill her day the precious bits of wool she s been given to weave the majestic tapestry of married love.

This remarkable book will show you how to start weaving love into the tapestry of your marriage today, as it leads you more deeply into the joys of love.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

The School Bell is Ringing….Are You Ready?

25 Thursday Aug 2022

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp, Organization Skills

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

organizing, overwhelmed

My “Getting Ready for School” repost….

I love school days. I am teaching a couple of the grandchildren. Here is my little schoolroom and my two little students.

Notice the Pennants hanging that the kids have colored. They have been enjoying those and we will continue to add to the collection and switch them up. You can download the pennants from this post.

Here are Theresa’s pennants that the students have been enjoying….

The school schedule can be a beautiful thing….it’s all in the attitude. So….Let’s Get Ready!

The School Bell is Ringing….Are You Ready?

With school just around the corner and so many responsibilities and things to accomplish, we may get a little nervous on how we are going to pull it all off.

I know, for me, summer time is so full, my days are bursting, that I truly wonder how I am going to “fit” school back in with all its demands.

I find my life goes in spurts. I am organized for a time, then it slips through my fingers for awhile. I have learned not to get discouraged, trusting that, with grace, I will get it together again. So I know what works for me and I know what doesn’t. Floundering does not work. 🙂 It is always good to have a plan.

The following are a few things that help me along the way not to get too stressed. Maybe a point or two might work for you, too.

1. Make your list. If you are feeling overwhelmed you may think that writing it all down will make you feel more burdened. That’s not how it works. When you can get it down on paper, you can sort and prioritize. Those lowest on the “essential” list can be put on the next day so you can slowly work at getting them all done. If you don’t get it done the next day, continue to add it to the next one. Checking each thing off gives you a sense of accomplishment and energizes you!

2. Keep the house picked up. My corners aren’t always great but if you were to walk into my house at a given time, it would be generally clean….unless we decided to go play volleyball instead of doing the dishes right away (priorities, you know. 🙂 )

3. Go to Bed. 🙂 If I can go to bed and get up at consistent hours, it helps a lot. It’s important for the kids to do the same. Summertime is a season of later bedtimes. We loosen up the night time schedule and relax for a spell. It is quite refreshing….for a time.  I notice how much it affects the next day, these inconsistent and later schedules. That’s okay for a while during the summer but you wouldn’t want to do that during school days. So regularity on getting to bed is important.

4. Wake up at a consistent time, earlier than the family, if you can. With the demands of young children, and the lack of sleep that goes with that, this isn’t always possible. At times like those, we need to just offer it up. That being said, nothing helps me more than getting up before everyone else, getting my prayers said, and doing other duties before the family gets up. It gets me started on the right foot.

5. Plan Your Meals! Okay this one I am not very good at but, Wow! does it take the stress-load off!! I have periods in my life when my girls are taking over the meals so it is hard for me to get back in the swing of things when they are occupied with other life things. But it makes such a huge difference! So if you can get it together once a week to plan those meals, DO SO! It will make a positive impact on your week!

6. Get yourself fully dressed first thing, right down to your shoes. This will help you to get motivated to accomplish things right off in the morning.  I also wash my face with cold water first thing in the morning. I started that 2 years ago when we had the drought. It was a waste of water to leave the tap running until it got warm, so the cold water did the job and now I like the “pick me up” it gives me. Try it! 🙂For Always - 2zxDa-b25d - print

So…what kind of things make me feel more organized and on top of things:

!. Number one for me is sticking to my “Spiritual List”, starting with morning prayers and then the other simple spiritual things on that list throughout the day.   If I can check each of those off then I feel like I have accomplished the most important duty and can have the focus and grace to accomplish the other ones that fill up my day.

2. If I haven’t already got an ongoing chore list for the kids (better if it is made the night before) so they know what they should be doing, I make a quick one in the morning for each child. Then everyone knows what they should be doing and you don’t have to have your mind going in all different directions trying to figure out what needs to be done and who needs to do it! The kids are able to tackle their jobs and have the satisfaction of checking it off each time it is accomplished! (Mom….don’t forget to inspect those chores!)

3. Keep the house picked up. (I know, I talked about this already.) Don’t get obsessive about it, especially if you have young children, but periodically through the day get everyone to help with a “pick-me-up”. When you can look at a clean table and a generally clean house, it invigorates and at the same time relaxes you. It’s easier to focus on the next thing to be done.

4. Delegate. Remember, you are the supervisor. Of course, supervisors get their hands dirty, too, but if there is something that you can delegate, do. It helps the children to grow into responsible adults.

5. Don’t listen to negative self-talk. Don’t analyze it, just don’t listen to it. Period. It will bring you down and make you sluggish in accomplishing what you need to get done. Instead, look at your list and do the next thing, say a prayer, grab a book and read it, spend some time with the kids. It’s not worth listening to the rubbish that goes on inside your head.

6. DON’T feel sorry for yourself!! If you have lots to do, thank God for it. He will help you accomplish it….one step at a time. There are many lonely people in this world, many trapped in their addictions, many sad and discouraged because of broken relationships. Learn to thank God for what you DO HAVE and all the wonderful things you GET TO DO each day. Sometimes it just takes an attitude change. He never gives us more than we can bear. Believe it!

7. One last tip….a little self-care goes a long way. Take a little time for yourself each day. It doesn’t have to be long, but something that will rejuvenate you…Reading a good book with a cup of tea, spending a half hour on your craft, taking a walk outside, hiding in your bedroom and eating the chocolate you have hidden for yourself…I like this one! You get the picture. Everyone’s situation is different and you can figure something out to give you a fresh kickstart during the day. Everything looks a little brighter after some revitalizing!

 
“Hospitality is so much more than entertaining-so much more than menus and decorating and putting on a show. To me, it means organizing my life in such a way that there’s always room for one more, always an extra place at the table or an extra pillow and blanket, always a welcome for those who need a listening ear. It means setting aside time for planned camaraderie and setting aside lesser priorities for impromptu gatherings.” -Emilie Barnes. Simple Secrets to a Beautiful Home
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Finer Femininity is a small publication compiled to inspire Catholic women in their vocations. It consists of uplifting articles from authors with traditional values, with many of them from priests, written over 50 years ago. These anecdotes are timeless but, with the fast-paced “progress “of today’s world, the pearls within the articles are rarely meditated upon. This little magazine offers Catholic womankind support and inspiration as they travel that oftentimes lonely trail….the narrow road to heaven. The thoughts within the pages will enlighten us to regard the frequently monotonous path of our “daily duties” as the beautiful road to sanctity. Feminine souls need this kind of information to continue to “fight the good fight” in a world that has opposing values and seldom offers any kind of support to these courageous women. Inside the pages you will find inspiration for your roles as single women, as wives and as mothers. In between the thought-provoking articles, the pages are sprinkled with pictures, quotes and maybe even a recipe or two.
The Mother’s Maglet, Wife’s Maglet, Young Lady’s, Sunshiny Disposition, True Womanhood and The Heart of the Home During Advent and Christmas…..Available here.

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  • Establish simple systems that save time and money and gain peace of mind
  • Organize the home’s problem areas–kitchen cupboards, crowded closets, home offices, and more
  • Reclaim precious time for family and friends

Filled with inspiration, encouragement, and tried-and-true tips, this book is a must-have for every woman!

The good news is that a beautiful home doesn’t require too much money, too much energy, or too much time. Bestselling author and home-management expert Emilie Barnes shows readers how they can easily weave beauty and happiness into the fabric of their daily lives. With just a touch of inspiration, readers can

  • turn their homes into havens of welcome and blessing
  • build a lifestyle that beautifully reflects their unique personalities
  • enrich their spirits with growing things (even if their thumbs are several shades shy of green)
  • make mealtimes feasts of thanksgiving and kitchen duty fun
  • establish traditions of celebration that allow joy to filter through to everyday life

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

A School Activity ~ DIY Colorful Pennant Border for Your Children!

16 Tuesday Aug 2022

Posted by Leanevdp in Activities, by Leane Vdp, Education, FF Tidbits, Printables

≈ 3 Comments

I am getting ready to teach some of my grandchildren this year and I always like to think of fun things we can do to decorate our “classroom” and to keep the children engaged while working with one of the other students. So I came up with this idea and thought I would share it with you…

These are pennant borders for the classroom that are simple and the kids can make themselves. What child doesn’t like to color? And when their coloring efforts are displayed in the classroom, how satisfying is that?

The Pennants

Supplies needed:

*My Pennant Series (links below)

This is the School Pennant Series

This is the Fall Pennant Series

This is the Religious Pennant Series

*Cardstock

*Crayons or Pencil Crayons (We used pencil crayons)

*Scissors

*Hole Punch

*Ribbon

I used light cardstock to print the pennants out.

The children color them….

After they are colored, they cut them out on the triangular outline….

Punch out the holes for the ribbon…

Insert the ribbon through the holes and tie it. I left about 1 – 2 inches between each pennant….

You can switch these pennants up according to the season or to your tastes.

Mix and match as you like to make an interesting, colorful and fun pennant. And now you have a lovely homemade border for your schoolroom! Enjoy!

The education of your children is the result of the combined efforts of both parents. But in his youngest years, the child is almost exclusively under the mother’s guidance.
Your efforts are to produce effects that will have their final reckoning in eternity. Although your educational influence is of a nature entirely different from that of the father, your vocation as mother is equal in importance to your husband’s. -The Catholic Family Handbook, Fr. Lovasik https://amzn.to/2DbczVj (afflink)
The ideal wife gives comfort and encouragement when needed. She is wise with a woman’s intuition…

A beautiful and colorful 30~Day Journal! This journal is for the single lady who is in the interim before finding her vocation in life. At this very important crossroad in life, this journal can help with discipline, inspiration and encouragement. All of the quotes deal with a young lady’s time in life….whether it is courtship, religious vocations, modesty and just a better spiritual life in general. A form of Morning and Night Prayers that I have used personally through the years is included at the beginning of the Journal. This 30~day journal is a tool that will help the young woman to be disciplined in the next 30 days to write down positive, thankful thoughts. It will help her focus on the true and lovely by thinking about good memories, special moments, things and people she is grateful for, etc., as she awaits the time her vocation is made manifest to her. NOW is the time to improve our lives! Available here.




 

This booklet contains practical advice on the subjects of dating and choosing a spouse from the Catholic theological viewpoint. Father Lovasik points out clearly what one’s moral obligations are in this area, providing an invaluable aid to youthful readers. Additionally, he demonstrates that Catholic marriage is different from secular marriage and why it is important to choose a partner who is of the Catholic Faith if one would insure his or her personal happiness in marriage. With the rampant dangers to impurity today, with the lax moral standards of a large segment of our society, with divorce at epidemic levels, Clean Love in Courtship will be a welcome source of light and guidance to Catholics serious about their faith.A Frank, Yet Reverent Instruction on the Intimate Matters of Personal Life for Young Men. To our dear and noble Catholic youths who have preserved, or want to recover, their purity of heart, and are minded to retain it throughout life. For various reasons many good fathers of themselves are not able to give their sons this enlightenment on the mysteries of life properly and sufficiently. They may find this book helpful in the discharge of their parental responsibilities in so delicate a matter.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

 

 

 

Fathers…Husbands ~ A Time to Reflect

20 Monday Jun 2022

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp, Loving Wife

≈ 1 Comment

Disclaimer

Yesterday was Father’s Day……the day that we acknowledge our fathers and our husbands.

These special men in our lives are imperfect people, but they hold a very important position in the family. They deserve the love and respect their position necessitates.

I know there are some husbands/fathers who are easier to love and respect than others. And there are wives who are more prone to seek out ways to make their husbands happy in the home.

There have been times in my life I have slipped into more negative attitudes towards my husband. The children pick up on it right away. It is damaging because the children see our example. If it is consistent, it affects the stability and the love in the home.

Remember that your children will follow your example in respecting and loving their father (and eventually their own husbands or superiors) in the home. They will also learn to disregard you, the mother, if they see you disrespecting your husband. It really does come back to bite us.

We need to take a hard look at our own attitudes towards our husbands and recognize an unhealthy outlook and battle against it.

Our first line of defense in getting our children to love and respect us is to first love and respect our husbands. In the Catholic home there should be no putting down of your husband. Our husband should be highly esteemed and revered. Marriage is a picture of Christ and His Church and we need to work on reflecting that in our actions towards our husbands.

Pamela Spurling from Welcome Home says:

“What *is* important is that you love him. What’s important is that you esteem and respect him. What’s important is that you demonstrate it to him. What’s important is that you show it around your children. What’s important is that you demonstrate that reverential love around others.

What’s important is that you learn to mean it with your whole heart. Even if he never gets that shed cleaned out. Even if he never gets the yard in order or mows that lawn diagonally so it looks better than neighbor Joe’s. Even if he never says things the way you think he should, or chews with his mouth closed, or keeps his shirt tucked in right, or gets you the right birthday presents or finishes household projects. Even if he never makes you all the wooden goodies Mr. John Doe makes for his wife, or never buys you surprise gifts. Even if he never learns anything more about automobiles than where to put the key to start them and where to put the gas to keep them running. So what.

What’s important is that you do what the LORD has designed you to do… and let the LORD work on your husband’s weak spots. I think we have much to work on without overly concerning ourselves with what they are or are not.

There is an amazing thing that wives can do and that is to love and support and build up husbands, and what a joyful thing it is to see the husband growing into the man God has designed him to be.

So, if you have been caught in the trap or habit of putting down your husband, mocking his leadership, disobeying known desires, disrespecting his words and views… rolling your eyes at his latest idea… sighing at his most recent business plan… you can turn. You can turn today. You can turn today and travel a different path. You can turn today and travel the path that God has designed for you.”

Yesterday way Father’s Day. The one day of the year that is chosen to honor Dad. I hope it was special. Let’s make a sincere effort to make him number one in our lives all year round.

One of our friends asked my husband if we were doing anything special for Father’s Day. He smiled at her and said, “Every day is Father’s Day!”  I was humbled and I admit, it is because he is a good man with a great attitude! 🙂

May wives everywhere strive to make every day Father’s Day!

Build your husband up in your children’s presence. It is up to you to assure he is a hero in their eyes. They should know why he works so hard….and that it is the reason for the roof over their heads and the food on the table. That time when Dad arrives home needs to be a highlight in their day! -Finer Femininity

You see, we don’t marry Prince Charming and live happily ever after. We are humans and we have faults….many faults….Both of us, husband and wife. It takes consistent effort to make a good marriage. Every day, every hour, every minute, we need to be thinking the right thoughts, praying the right prayers, listening to the right people and doing the right things…

❤️🌹Our first line of defense is the bond we must have with our husband. Besides our spiritual life, which gives us the grace to do so, we must put our relationship with our husband first. It is something we work on each day.

How do we do this? Many times it is just by a tweaking of the attitude, seeing things from a different perspective. It is by practicing the virtues….self-sacrifice, submission, thankfulness, kindness, graciousness, etc.

The articles in this maglet will help you with these things. They are written by authors that are solid Catholics, as well as authors with old-fashioned values….
Available here.
Pkg Deal on Catholic Wife’s Maglet and Catholic Young Lady’s Maglet here.

 

I have prepared this Lenten journal to help you to keep on track. It is to assist you in keeping focused on making Lent a special time for your family. We do not have to do great things to influence those little people. No, we must do the small things in a great way…with love and consistency…

Timeless words from the pen of Bishop Fulton J. Sheen inspire the heart and imagination as readers embark on a Lenten journey toward a better understanding of their spiritual selves. Covering the traditional themes of Lent–sin and salvation, death and Resurrection, sorrow and hope, ashes and lilies–these 50 passages and accompanying mini-prayers offer readers a practical spiritual program as a retreat from the cares and concerns of a secular world view.
This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

Practical Tips on Modesty

07 Tuesday Jun 2022

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp, Modesty

≈ 6 Comments

by Leane VanderPutten

Today I’d like to talk a little bit about some of the practical aspects of living a modest lifestyle. You may also like to watch this video of my own thoughts on Modesty and also my Modesty Journey…

And here is my daughter, Rosie’s post on Modesty.

Before I get into the Practical Tips of Modesty, I just want to say a word about sewing…

You may not be a sew-er. A couple of my girls are, the rest…not really. But we have a sewing machine and the girls at home can sit down and sew a seam if they want to.

Thrift shops are our friend but oftentimes we need to let down a hem or add lace to a sleeve.

Sewing is not as complicated as learning how to use a cell phone, so it is something that is worthwhile learning. Even just the basics. In your modesty journey, a sewing machine is very helpful.

I have watched my oldest daughter, Virginia, take some curtains that she found at our favorite thrift store and turn it into a lovely skirt. When we need 3 or 4 inches added to a skirt, she always has material around to help in that area.

She gets sheets to line her aprons, lace and lovely vintage buttons to embellish her creations, and so much more! This makes it fun and exciting!

Sewing also helps if you have a more uncommon shape as a girl/woman.

OK, onto some practical tips…

PRACTICAL TIPS:

Six things to ponder…

1.        You know the saying…I wear my heart on my sleeve? Well, we wear our hearts on the clothes we wear. We really do. So, What do the clothes I wear say about where my heart is??

2.       When I go to choose an outfit for the day, am I choosing an outfit to attract attention in the wrong way to those around me? Am I seeking to impress Our Lord with the clothing I wear today….always with dignity and a touch of class.

3.       Is what I wear consistent with Our Lady’s values of modesty, self-control and respectable apparel, or does my dress reveal an inordinate identification and fascination with sinful cultural values?

4.       Who am I trying to identify with through my dress? Is the Church, the Fathers, Tradition and Our Lady my standard or is it the latest fashion?

5.         Have I sought out other godly persons to help me decide an outfit if I am struggling whether it is modest enough?

6.         The clothing I wear….could someone look at me and know that I am a woman of morals, of faith, of integrity. Or does my clothing contradict this profession of faith?

“How does a woman discern the sometimes fine line between proper dress and dressing to be the center of attention? The answer starts in the intent of the heart.

A woman should examine her motives and goals for the way she dresses. Is her intent to show the grace and beauty of womanhood? Is it to reveal a humble heart devoted to worshiping God? Or is it to call attention to herself and flaunt her beauty? Or worse, to attempt to lure men sexually?

A woman who focuses on worshiping God will consider carefully how she is dressed, because her heart will dictate her wardrobe and appearance.” John MacArthur

Blouses and Tops:

CAMISOLES OR TANK TOPS

Camisoles are wonderful. We make much use out of them to put under our tops. They can help make a see-through top modest, and a top that is too low-cut suddenly is just fine. They can also help to keep the material on top of the camisole, your outer garment, too clingy.

You do have to be careful, though. You don’t want to get the spaghetti strap camisole and then have a see through top as the straps look like underwear anyway and expose too much of the back. But if see-through is not the issue, then a spaghetti strap camisole is fine IF it is high enough. If it isn’t then pin those straps to your bra.

You can look at camisoles here.

Personally I like to wear what I call a shell or tank top. They are sleeveless but not spaghetti straps. They cover more and usually come up more in the front. If you find the shell is too low, we have also worn with the back in the front. The back always come up higher. And since a lot of these shells don’t have tags on the back, just a bit of writing on the inside, this can work fine, too.

You can look at tank tops here.

Sometimes you can just use mock clip on camisoles if it is just the neckline you are trying to make more modest.My girls have done this. You can get them on Amazon or Ebay

Mock Camisoles can be found here.

Your underlay….the camisoles or shells may be a bit low. Do pin them so they don’t ride down during the day. If the girls forget to do this I am constantly reminding them to pull up their undershirt. What good is it if it is always riding down?

LIGHT, SEE THROUGH COMPLETE OVERLAYS:

We have a favorite Thrift Shop…it’s called God’s Storehouse…very fitting. There we have purchased several light, flowy, feminine, tops that are so light they go right over a t-shirt and don’t add a lot of bulk. Some of My girls love this look and with the t-shirt underneath it is perfectly modest. And the overlays can be quite pretty. Because they are more of a flowy cut one does not have to worry about clingy or tight.

I realize that you may think this is too hot for the summertime and I understand. One thing I have found, though, is that you can get quite used to a little more bulk. I never thought this was possible myself. We live in Kansas and it, too, is hot. I have found through the years that I can put up with a light layer and it doesn’t bug me like it used to. I am from Canada and the heat really gets to me!

BLOUSES

Also, just a lovely, short sleeve cotton blouse that is not see through is a good choice for the summer. I don’t button my top button but if the next button is a bit too low (remember the two-finger rule under the collar bone) I use a safety pin…always! Remember…safety pins are your friends!

Here’s a little tutorial on how to change a longer sleeve blouse into a short one….

Remember, though, that a blouse that is too tight is just that…too tight. Scrap it. How do we tell?

A shirt that shows tension folds at the bust area is too tight. Also, if the material pulls in right under the bust area…not good. There should be a natural flow between that area and your tummy area.

SLEEVES

Sleeves need to be longer than just a cap sleeve. You don’t want to be showing off your armpits…either with too short of a sleeve…or too flouncy.

LAYERING

In the winter time, layering is fun and very useful. You can wear those long sleeve t-shirts (and there are a multitude of colors available) with a vest over top, a nice lacy layer (light lace or a heavier knit), your complete flowy blouse overlay, etc. Scarves are wonderful for smoothing things out and covering up. I wouldn’t use a scarf, necessarily, for covering a low neck unless it was pinned in place. Scarves move around and aren’t always a good choice for that.

AVOID T-SHIRTS BECAUSE THEY TEND TO CLING TO ALL THE WRONG PLACES.

But…If I have a knit shirt that isn’t necessarily too tight but I may feel is drawing too much attention to the chest part, a scarf cuts that up pretty good and distracts from that area.

Once again, though, too tight is just too tight and needs to go…

Also, Don’t wear t-shirts with writing on them. It is like a billboard that your eyes are drawn to.

OVERLAYS WITH BROOCH OR SHAWL PINS

I like to use brooches to pin my overlays together in the front. And we have just discovered shawl pins that allows a little bit of room so you don’t have to pull that overlay together completely. They also are very pretty and work better than an actual brooch, in my opinion.

I really like these clips because they don’t put a hole in your garment. They are available here.

We use these shawl pins, too. Available here.

These pretty pearl shawl pins are available here.

DRESSES

NOT CLINGY OR TIGHT

Once again, knits can be clingy…but not all knits. So do try on those dresses before you buy them. You don’t want them tight.

The girls will often ask me when they come downstairs dressed to watch them walk so they know whether that skirt/dress clings too much. If it does, the skirt or dress goes out or they wear a longer overlay to compensate.

TOO SHORT

Dresses and skirts are too short if they don’t cover your knees when you sit down. I remember a good nun who was teaching class to her all-girl students…when the girl’s legs were up or her dress was too short, she would scold them saying she could see her “kingdom come”. We got the point.

My thought is….at least 4 inches past the knee. Really, it is much more elegant to wear a longer dress or skirt. That’s the way I see it…even on a natural level.

SWIMSUITS

with a little help from Modesty Matters by Pam Hardy

Let’s talk about swimsuits. Basically a swimsuit these days cover the same area of the body that your undergarments do. Let me ask you this? Would you go around wearing your underwear. I don’t think so.  Yet, women (and men) do all the time when they are swimming.

Here’s a bit of a tidbit….

In 1922, if you wore what today would be considered a very modest one-piece swimsuit you would have been arrested for indecent exposure (Jeff Pollard, Christian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America).  That is how much the standard has been lowered in our society, in the last 80 years.

I know many good girls who would say this, “You know when you get really honest, there is no such thing as a modest swimsuit.”  I have to agree.

Now, that doesn’t mean you can’t go swimming. But it may not be quite as easy as the girl who just dons her one-piece or two piece bathing suit. That’s OK. It’s worth it.

Today there are many things to choose from online that are becoming more and more trendy for the girl who want to cover more than the average swimmer.

For us, we have had our bathing suits made. I don’t have any pictures….at least I couldn’t find any…so here is kind of what they look like. We make our skirts longer.

You can also do research online to find some good examples. Then if you are handy with the sewing machine you can make yourself one…or hire someone else to do it. It will be an investment well worth the money you spend on it.

Let’s make the effort to be modest when we swim. Will you look different than others? You bet! And that’s a good thing. Hold your head high…not in haughtiness…but in knowing you are making an effort to please God. And that is enough.

DRESSING MODESTLY IS COMFORTABLE…

Let’s face it. Being modest can work for us as far as covering up those things we are self-conscious about….and we look like beautiful feminine women…by covering up! More comfortable in that way..yes!

Also, looser fitting clothing is definitely more comfortable than tight-fitting clothing. Back in the day, I had friends who would get their jeans out of the dryer and literally have to lie on the bed to do the zippers up. They would shrink a bit during the laundering process and since they were skin tight, they were hard to get on! Sounds like a straight jacket to me…not too comfy!

Things that constrict movement are not very comfortable!

Wrapping it up…

When it comes to modesty, women have a responsibility (Men do, too, but this is not a men’s article):

  • Women must dress modestly and not be afraid to spread that good news with humility and charity.
  • Mothers need to teach their daughters to dress modestly at a very young age. You cannot allow immodesty and all of a sudden expect them to be modest at a magical age. Talk to your daughters about modesty, not in an unpleasant, condemning way…but in a bright and positive light. Make it pleasurable for them to dress modestly by allowing them to sew, or just shop for nice clothes.

When you dress modestly, what are the results?  God and Our Lady are very pleased and you are a good example, an inspiration and an encouragement to others. You will have a clear conscience because you will not be a stumbling block to the men around you.

Remember our ultimate goal is to please God. In turn He will give us a peace and happiness…

For a list of Stores That Sell Modest Clothing see this post on Beauty So Ancient.

Swimsuits:

PLACES TO SHOP

Modli

Hydrochic

Dressing for His Glory

WHAT TO LOOK FOR ONLINE:

Sunsuits for girls

Surfsuits Rashguard – covers the top

Micosuza Women’s Skirted Swim Capris

Look for Jewish or Israeli modest swimwear

Micosuza swimsuit for women

Freestyle Swim Skirt Surf Tops

 

Alice von Hildebrand – “St. Francis de Sales tells us that pious women should be well-dressed, but this doesn’t mean they must become slaves of fashion. There’s a way of dressing which is attractive, even elegant, but at the same time modest and simple. More importantly, attractiveness shouldn’t be reserved for guests and those you meet outside the home, while you ‘let yourself go’ when you’re at home. The moment a couple marries, they should begin to try always to be at their best for each other, physically (and above all) spiritually.”

Here is a simple outline to ensure we are carrying out our daily duties as best we can on this road we travel as Catholic women. This is my own list of what I deem the basics of a successful day. It is an ideal I strive for. You may have your own plan, and I hope you do. If this can help in any way, then I have accomplished my goal with this video…

This journal is for the single lady who is in the interim before finding her vocation in life. At this very important crossroad in life, this journal can help with discipline, inspiration and encouragement.

All of the quotes deal with a young lady’s time in life….whether it is courtship, religious vocations, modesty and just a better spiritual life in general. A form of Morning and Night Prayers that I have used personally through the years is included at the beginning of the Journal.

This 30~day journal is a tool that will help the young woman to be disciplined in the next 30 days to write down positive, thankful thoughts. It will help her focus on the true and lovely by thinking about good memories, special moments, things and people she is grateful for, etc., as she awaits the time her vocation is made manifest to her.

NOW is the time to improve our lives!

Available here.




 

This booklet contains practical advice on the subjects of dating and choosing a spouse from the Catholic theological viewpoint. Father Lovasik points out clearly what one’s moral obligations are in this area, providing an invaluable aid to youthful readers. Additionally, he demonstrates that Catholic marriage is different from secular marriage and why it is important to choose a partner who is of the Catholic Faith if one would insure his or her personal happiness in marriage. With the rampant dangers to impurity today, with the lax moral standards of a large segment of our society, with divorce at epidemic levels, Clean Love in Courtship will be a welcome source of light and guidance to Catholics serious about their faith.

A Frank, Yet Reverent Instruction on the Intimate Matters of Personal Life for Young Men. To our dear and noble Catholic youths who have preserved, or want to recover, their purity of heart, and are minded to retain it throughout life. For various reasons many good fathers of themselves are not able to give their sons this enlightenment on the mysteries of life properly and sufficiently. They may find this book helpful in the discharge of their parental responsibilities in so delicate a matter.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

 

 

Self-Conscious Sue and the Ice Cream Social

02 Thursday Jun 2022

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp, Peace....Leaving Worry Behind

≈ 4 Comments

A little story to remind us that the more we forget self, the happier we become….

by Leane VanderPutten

It was a lovely afternoon with the branches of the trees swaying in the breeze. Suzi was looking out the window as she was wiping the last of the dishes.

Tonight was the Ice Cream Social. All the young people in their parish, the neighboring parish and maybe even some out-of-towners would be there. There would be ice cream, games, a live band. It should be fun. The weather was mild and lovely.

But Sue’s brow was furrowed. She wasn’t thinking of the ice cream, the games or the weather. She was annoyed with herself…Why did she have to be so self-conscious around people? Why couldn’t she be more relaxed and comfortable? She knew others could tell she was self-conscious, and that made it worse.

While the outgoing, smiling girls made the boys and their comrades feel comfortable, Sue’s gestures were stiff…awkward…which made others feel awkward, too. So she was subtly avoided.

And tonight would be the same. Yes, Sue wanted to go, but she knew what would happen…again. She would struggle the whole evening pretending she wasn’t self-conscious. You can only fool yourself and others for so long.

She knew Charles would be there, too. She respected and liked Charles. He had an easy-going way about him. He was head of the Altar Servers, was religious, yet not with an air of fake piety.

Charles was genuine and liked by many. Tonight, once again, she would look on, wistful as the crowd gathered around him, chatting, laughing and having a good time.

It was hard on her.

And that’s why her brows were furrowed.

Her mom noticed. “Something wrong, dear?“

Sue winced. She didn’t really want to talk about it. It wasn’t something that could be solved by talking. She had learned that in the past.

Her mom sensed the reticence to talk and, not wanting to pry, said a little prayer for her daughter as she went to fold the rest of the clothes. She knew her daughter struggled with these things…

Sue finished the dishes and went to get dressed for the Social.

As she was passing the coffee table, she noticed a book perched on the corner. It was called “Quotes of Wisdom”. She went over and fingered the pages.

“Mom must have just got this book,” she thought.

She didn’t have much time but she opened it up and her eyes fell upon a quote by C.S. Lewis.

“Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It is thinking of yourself less.” She heard this quote before but this time was different. It struck a chord with her.

It’s true, she thought. She went to these parties, thinking of herself…how awkward she was, how shy she felt, how she wished she was like so-and-so or how she yearned Charles would pay attention to her.

Something clicked in Sue this time. “I’m going to do this party different,” she thought. “I’m going there and I’m going to think of others. I’m going to offer a hand to the hostess if she needs help. I’m going to notice if anyone is in need, or feeling awkward like I do, and be extra friendly to them. If I end up in a conversation I’m going to ask questions about them and let them talk.”

Sue’s heart was feeling lighter. As she was getting ready for the party, though, she began to slip back into her worry-mode. “What about this…. “What if I….”, etc.

Whoa! She stopped her thoughts. She mentally gathered those worries and fears in her arms, imagined herself looking into the tender and loving eyes of her Blessed Mother and laid those burdens at her feet.

“Please take care of them, my Mother!“

She threw on her wrap, said goodbye to her parents and walked the short way to the Social.

All through the evening she could feel herself wanting to hide or found herself slipping into self-condemning, intimidating thoughts. She would stop herself each time and leave them at Our Lady’s feet. It helped. It wasn’t easy or perfect, but she knew things were different this time.

And as the evening was coming to a close she actually had a small number of smiling friends form a bit of a circle around her.

Sue looked at her watch. It was late, she knew she had to get home. She finished helping the hostess cleanup.

She went to the closet to get her light wrap she had brought. All of a sudden, a hand reached up and took the wrap from her.

“Let me help you.“

She turned. It was Charles.

“Thank you.“. She said, her eyes sparkling.

As she dashed off into the night, the breeze playing through her hair, she looked up into the starry night and whispered another heartfelt “Thank you!”

Thought for the day…..

Father Irala from Achieving Peace of Heart:

No one who lives for himself alone lives as fully or produces as much as he who lives for others and does good for others.

When you are dominated by your unconscious mental activities, you lead a negative life which is colored by a sickly egoism.

You are always thinking of your own troubles and finding ways to lessen them. You can find no time to busy yourself with others or do any positive and progressive work. You see the enemy everywhere and are wholly taken up with fleeing from him.

Such a person lives, as Fosdick puts it, as if in a room lined with mirrors. Wherever he looks he sees himself.

But when he busies himself with others, several of these mirrors are changed into windows through which he can see other faces, other lives and other more pleasant landscapes.

“I have tried to show you , that you cannot become good and strong men and women, that is, men and women of character, unless you have Will-power, and further that you will be of little or no use to your country if you are weak-willed. It has been well said that ‘the only way to be a patriotic American is to do your best to become a perfect man.’ and a perfect man you will not be unless your Will is strong.”

This Maglet (magazine/booklet) is for you…dear young (and not-so-young), Catholic, Feminine Soul.

It is a compilation of traditional, valuable Catholic articles on the subjects that touch the hearts of serious-minded Catholic young ladies.

There are articles on courtship, purity, singleness, vocation, prayer, confession, friends, tea parties, obedience, etc.

This information is solid, written by orthodox Catholic writers (most of them gone to their eternal home) that cared about the proper formation of a young Catholic adult in a confused world.

Take this information to heart and your journey through adulthood will be filled with many blessings!

It is 40 pages, packed with information. See photo for Table of Contents. Available here.


The book is filled with wonderful advice on how to live a happy life…

Here is a complete guide to mature, responsible, even noble behavior in our complex modern society. Written in the 1930s by a wise Jesuit priest and steeped in the wisdom of the ages, these pages teach the timeless principles that have led countless souls to true success and lasting happiness….

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Hectic Days for Helen

18 Wednesday May 2022

Posted by Leanevdp in Attitude, by Leane Vdp, Motherhood

≈ 2 Comments

by Leane VanderPutten

The July day was sunny, the scent of petunias wafted in the air. The air was cooling off a bit and the breeze softly wafted through the branches of the trees. Summer was at its peak.

But Helen was not enjoying the breeze or the flowers.

Helen was tired. Not for any particular reason. Yes, it was summer, the kids were done with their home school and, instead of life slowing down, things seemed to have sped up.

June and July had been particularly hot, they didn’t have a pool, so the children spent time indoors during the heat of the day. Without the schedule of school, mayhem seemed to reign with more frequency than Helen liked.

Helen’s husband, Mark, was working lots of hours. Summer was the time his work became very demanding because he was in the construction field. So he was not around much to help out. And when he got home he was tired and even cranky at times.

“Such is life,” Helen sighed. Lately, things hadn’t been working out the way she had imagined. Instead of enjoying the so-called “lazy days of summer” she was fighting inner turmoil.  She was struggling through the days, battling thoughts of self-pity and complaining.

“Why can’t the kids be quiet now on again?”

“Dirty diapers, dishes, it’s discouraging,” she thought. “And life is only going to get more and more hectic as the years go by. I just don’t know if I can do this!”

This day had been particularly trying so when rosary time came around, amid the slouching children and wriggling baby, she implored Our Lady to help her.

The next day Helen woke up with a terrific pain in her side that didn’t want to leave. It was debilitating so she had to call in a babysitter to take over.

That night was sleepless. The next day, after a doctor’s appointment, she started an antibiotic for a bladder infection.

The antibiotic didn’t work so another one was tried. That one alleviated some of the symptoms for a short while but they came back with a vengeance.

The next couple of weeks were harder than ever for Helen. The worst part was the worry. She didn’t know what this mysterious pain was and, since they didn’t have insurance, she wasn’t going to run in and have a bunch of tests done. At least not right away.

So she was stuck worrying. What happens if it was something really bad? She’d find herself looking at her kids and imagine leaving them to fend for themselves in a crazy world.

When her husband came home,  her thoughts wandered to whether he would be left alone… If this was something that could actually take her life? She pushed a lot of those thoughts away but with her melancholic nature, they kept creeping back.

After a very bad night, finally, Helen went back to the doctor….this time a different doctor. He heard all the symptoms and told her that it sounded like she was just trying to pass a kidney stone.

This was news to Helen! She didn’t understand why the first doctor didn’t spot that?

Her step was a little lighter as she left the doctor’s office even though she still had pain. She got home and drank lots and lots of lemon water and took hydrangea tincture.

Within a few of days, she passed that kidney stone and was feeling much better!

The pain was gone, but the best part was that the worry was gone! With all the imaginings of her having a dread disease she had been tied up in knots!
Now that she knew things were OK, her heart filled with joy and thanksgiving!

The following days things began to get back to normal – hectic life came back full force.

But Helen’s heart had changed, indeed!

It still wasn’t easy to drag herself out of bed in the morning, but her heart was filled with thanksgiving because she could actually get up and take care of her children. Were the children any quieter? No. But she appreciated the laughter and the noise instead of always fighting against it. Did hubby come home earlier? No. But she was grateful that her husband had the work that he did and was not upset that he wasn’t around to help.

Her heart sang as she did the dishes.

She still got impatient, things weren’t flawless, but Helen was seeing things through different eyes.

She thought back on that evening when she implored Our Lady, during the rosary, to help her. She realized how much she had helped – maybe not in the way she had wanted or expected but it didn’t matter. She knew it was a gift right from her Mother‘s hands!

The summer days passed quickly. There were many joys in between the rough spots. Helen had learned a lesson. She hoped it would stick. She prayed it would stick.

Those weeks when things got rather dark for her taught her something special besides being grateful for the daily grind. She made up her mind that she would thank God for her crosses as she was going through them, knowing that He had the best possible plan in mind for her and that good would come from them.

It also came home to her that each new day was a gift. She would work hard at tuning her mind into that at the beginning of the day so that when the day ramped up she would have a spirit of gratefulness in spite of everything else.

As Helen sat outside in the early autumn breeze of the evening, amidst the floating aroma of the petunias, she thought to herself, “Indeed, it has been a very productive summer!”

Is it all about being right when we are having a disagreement? Do we need to be on the defensive each time we feel he is being unreasonable? That only seems fair, doesn’t it? Well, go ahead. But your relationship will suffer. It is more important, not that you “win” or that you always come out feeling like you gave the last verbal punch. Like Our Lord, we win through kindness and meekness.
What it comes down to is: Do you want to be RIGHT or do you want to be HAPPY? “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you!” www.finerfem.com

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Father talks about how important our duties of our vocation are, that they are the will of God for us, we need look no further. He touches on the specific duties of each of our different walks of life….

 

 

 

A Little Lesson ~ Tammy’s Cloud

09 Monday May 2022

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp, FF Tidbits, Praying

≈ 7 Comments

by Leane VanderPutten

Tammy was feeling testy lately and she didn’t know why. She felt like this periodically and it was an uncomfortable sort of thing. Kind of like a cloud that had settled around her…a greyish one that made her uneasy…like all was not okay.

She was short with the kids and her husband, which made the cloud a little more dense. She felt like she was losing control and slipping…

Many things had her worried. Things like…

Why is Susie disobeying so much lately?

How can I get little George potty-trained?

Hubby seems so tired lately…I hope everything is all right.

I wish I wouldn’t have gained that 5 lbs.…

My prayer life needs help…

Why is the neighbor so grouchy with me these days?

And on and on.

This weekend a visiting priest was coming to give a women’s conference. Tammy wasn’t looking forward to it. She had this unpleasant feeling she would walk away from it feeling even more inadequate than ever.

No, she wasn’t praying enough.

Yes, her routine was often messed up…sometimes through her own fault.

No, she hadn’t been making it very often to daily Mass.

She felt she would be reminded of these many inadequacies that were weighing heavy upon her.

Tammy made it through the rest of the week, each day muddling through as the cloud of anxiety stuck with her. It was in the background, and, though Tammy managed to get the basics done each day… it was there, like a chronic itch that was especially annoying when one was being still.

Saturday came. Hubby had said he would watch the kids so Tammy could go to the conference. Tammy was off to Mass, doing her best to have a positive attitude about the talks.

As Tammy sat down in the hall, she noticed many other women coming to take part in the conferences. She wondered if they had it all together. They were smiling, talking and laughing. Tammy said hi to several of them as they were, of course, familiar faces, many of them were friends.

Father went to the podium and introduced himself and began his talk. Tammy fidgeted and tried to pull her thoughts away from the many chores that awaited her at home.

As Father proceeded in his talk, she started to take more notice.

“I’m here today to take that baseball bat that you keep hitting yourself with, out of your hand…”

Hmmm…she thought. That would probably be a good thing.

“We often rely on our own power, our own strength to overcome our faults and failings. We also rely on ourselves often to ‘fix things’ that are, a lot of times, out of our control,” he continued.

“And even if there IS something we should or should not be doing, the strength to carry this out and the wisdom to know what we should be doing evades us. We want answers but we don’t have them.

So, really, the solution to these daily problems is a continual crying out to God for help…for grace, for wisdom. It’s as simple as that…. a continual reaching out to Him Who wants to help in all the nitty gritty details of life.

But how do you do that, as busy wives, and mothers? You often hit the ground running as you struggle to get the day rolling with the multitude of needs that beg to be met.

In the morning, on arising, we can direct to the Most High through the Morning Offering, all the activity of the day.

This is most important, because as the hours and minutes roll by, the various actions rise in homage to God.”

Ok, I do that, thought Tammy. So at least I am starting out my day by doing the right thing.

The priest continued….

“From time to time throughout the day, think of raising our mind and heart to God. Each person has their own individual way of conversing with God. And this is good. God loves us and He made us each with a unique personality and way of expressing ourselves.

A continual conversation with Him throughout the day is very valuable! Like a best friend, and of course, He is the very best, take your cares, your joys, your struggles to Him throughout the day. Talk to Him.

It’s not difficult to do this…it is a matter of habit…of remembering to lift our hearts to Him often throughout the day.

How can we do this? Find ways that help you remember.

As you are getting dressed in the morning, talk familiarly with God. Imagine putting on the armor of God and ask Him to protect you from any evil that may come your way today, to protect you from negative thoughts, from getting discouraged. Ask Him to help you smile more, be more relaxed and peaceful about things….or whatever you wish to say to Him first thing in the morning.

When you have your morning tea or coffee, a quick prayer of gratefulness to Him who gave you this to enjoy is valuable.

As you are teaching school, pray for those children who are having problems…a quick prayer…and then for yourself, the teacher, the mother.

During the children’s nap time, send a quick prayer to the Holy Ghost that you use the time wisely. Then go about your business.

Ask for energy, temperance, kindness, etc. often during the day…”

Father went on about intimately conversing with God and with Our Lady because they are truly our best friends.

Then he concluded, “If it is one thing I am going to give you as homework from this conference, it is this:

Increase your conversation with God throughout the day.

That’s it.

Yes, say your regular prayers, try to say them better. But most importantly, talk to Him throughout the day about your fears, your frustrations, your loneliness, your joys, your gratefulness, etc.”

Tammy walked away that day with a lighter step. Father did not make her feel guilty…he just encouraged her to seek for a deeper relationship with God…not by spending more time in prayer but by learning to converse with Him throughout the day. She felt she could do that.

The next few days, Tammy talked to God, Our Lady, the saints and her Guardian Angel about a lot of things throughout the day… her neighbor’s grouchiness, (“St. Anne, please help my neighbor with whatever it is that is bothering her”) Susie’s disobedience (“Blessed Mother, help Susie, and help me to know what to do”), her bothersome weight gain (“Dear Lord, give me wisdom and temperance”), etc. Little prayers were being sent up all through the day as Tammy thought of it…

After a month or so, Tammy realized something…that cloud of anxiety had dissipated…it was gone!

The problems were still there, there would always be problems, but that cloud of anxiety Our Lord had taken care of. By her continual reaching out to Him, He had in turn, given her more peace in her days!

And it showed in her family life. Her husband made a comment to her that he noticed she was more at peace, more cheerful. This made him happier, too. The children seemed to get along better and, well, life in general, perked up! After all, if Mama’s not happy, her little world feels it!

Tammy was very grateful!

Never forget that it is God’s will that the parents should be the ones to teach the child to pray, as Mary and Joseph helped the boy Jesus to advance in wisdom and grace. -A Dominican Nun, 1954

We must realize that building back to traditional values starts, first, in ourselves and in our homes. Which, in turn, will affect our communities and society in general. And our dress is a powerful means to do just that! It IS like a billboard saying, “There is still something beautiful, noble and good in this world, and it is worth living for.”

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Losing your peace of soul over the state of the world and the Church? Don’t! Consider the following books…..

We live in an age characterized by agitation and lack of peace. This tendency manifests itself in our spiritual as well as our secular life. In our search for God and holiness, in our service to our neighbor, a kind of restlessness and anxiety take the place of the confidence and peace which ought to be ours. What must we do to overcome the moments of fear and distress which assail us? How can we learn to place all our confidence in God and abandon ourselves into his loving care? This is what is taught in this simple, yet profound little treatise on peace of heart. Taking concrete examples from our everyday life, the author invites us to respond in a Gospel fashion to the upsetting situations we must all confront. Since peace of heart is a pure gift of God, it is something we should seek, pursue and ask him for without cease. This book is here to help us in that pursuit.

Reverend Irala here addresses ways to promote mental and emotional well-being to help increase one’s health, efficiency and happiness. He speaks on topics such as how to rest, think, use the will, control feelings, train the sexual instinct, be happy, and choose an ideal. Included are also many practical instructions on dealing with mental struggles of all kinds. This book is most useful in our present times of worldly confusion.

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