Category Archives: Family Life

The Family and the Cross ~ Rev. Msgr. Irving A. Deblanc

16 Thursday Mar 2023

Posted by in Family Life, Lent

≈ 1 Comment

This is a beautiful meditation for Lent and well worth your time!

by Rev. Msgr. Irving A. Deblanc, 1950’s

Ask mothers and fathers if they would like to become saints. Many apologetically answer, “Would that I had the time! I am too busy rearing the children, keeping house, making ends meet.”

This recalls the days when some considered sanctity a luxury for the rich, who in being able to afford servants, could spend long hours in church and in prayer: they were often considered to be the holy ones.

Pope Benedict XV defined holiness as doing the will of God according to one’s state of life. In the state of grace and with the right intention, married people can become saints doing their everyday home work.

They often gain more graces with a dish cloth than with a Rosary, as one may sometime gain more graces getting up in the middle of the night to care for a baby than spending an hour in church. It is a matter of doing the right thing at the right time. Yes, but even more, it is fulfilling a sacramental vocation.

This cannot be said in the same sense about being a lawyer, or a secretary, or a farmer. Marriage is a vocation; it is holy; it is a sacrament; it is a means of going to heaven.

It is interesting that only three of the sacraments are entitled ‘holy: Holy Eucharist, Holy Orders, Holy Matrimony – not that the others are not holy but these are specifically designated.

As a priest gets graces when he hears confessions, preaches, reads his breviary, so a couple under the right conditions is flooded with God’s graces when they love each other, nurse a baby, teach the children. This because they too are fulfilling their vocation.

It is because more and more people see marriage as a vocation that we can hope for more and more saints among those living family life.

In Peru four natives have already been canonized and one beatified in a hundred years. In the U.S.A. so far we still have had no natives canonized. I am afraid we are not even remotely thinking in the direction of trying to be worthy to be a canonized saint.

Married couples are sometimes unaware that suffering is one of their great home-made tools for sanctity. It is looked upon as an annoyance, but Christian marital love necessarily involves suffering, for the essence of unity is not so much to enjoy each other, but to suffer together.

Still joy and suffering are not two sides of a unity called love. What was once desire before marriage becomes offering after marriage.

Some have described love as having three aspects: the digestive, the reciprocal, and the oblative. It is in the oblative sense, this self-giving and suffering that a couple purifies love.

Without these elements, love would die, for passion can only promise; love can keep that promise.

To refuse the call of self-immolation is the sin of obduracy and a rejection of love. One is then of no use to God, to society, to each other, or to oneself. To say no to this human impulse is to corrupt all one touches. It is the cult of selfishness.

The Cross can teach us to love our neighbor; it can teach us compassion. Three-fourths of us, it is said, need it, but there is a strange, unhappy feeling that in too many souls this ingredient is left out.

The Cross is our main tool of sanctity at home. Christian love understands the Cross if it is seen in the context of Heaven.

For pagans the Cross is a scandal. It absorbs them like whirlpools in a river at flood height. Suffering, however, must draw men outside of themselves. It is a reminder of Divinity itself. Not good in itself, the Cross can be priceless as a means of grace.

The bell rings in the life of every one of us and all of us are someday called upon to suffer. The non-Christian tries to escape suffering and he becomes hard and selfish. He seeks comfort only and his spiritual energy dries up, but he must learn to suffer or it will destroy him.

The egotist detaches himself from spiritual reality and becomes a hollow being-an empty body. Like the statue of Buddha, he looks down only at his own stomach and does not see the needy around him.

Not all can see the value of suffering. Suffering is often so inward, so hard to articulate. It has been a special mystery to all, especially pagans. Their many explanations have never been satisfactory.

The Stoic saw in suffering a test of sheer courage; he was completely indifferent to it. The Epicurean saw his answer in pleasure, and the Dolorist tried to delude himself and saw evil as good and actually exulted in that which diminished him. Others saw in suffering only a mere punishment.

A good Catholic makes friends with pain. He holds God’s gifts close to himself but always with open hands. When God allows us sufferings it is not to do us harm but to gather us into His arms.

Suffering never gags a Christian; upon it he sharpens his teeth. Like a cargo stabilizing a ship against storms, so suffering stabilizes us against the storms of passion.

Humanity will ever question suffering, as Job did so dramatically and so officially. But Job gave an answer. Pagan philosophers never learned it. Christ gave the answer for all times: suffering calls less for a philosophy, more for a living of it as worthwhile.

So vast was this question, says Paul Claudel, the great convert to Catholicism, that the Word alone could answer it, but He did so not by an explanation, only by His presence. This presence helped Mary who stood beneath the first Red Cross crimsoned by the blood of her Son; it helped Veronica who so lovingly held a cool, moist compress to the throbbing, fevered brow of Christ; it helped Simon of Cyrene, who later gave his life to serve others; this same Simon must have seen the pallid face of Christ among the poor and on every crumpled pillow where a sick man’s head lay.

We learn with St. Francis de Sales that the love of Jesus begins in the Passion. We learn with Bishop Neumann of the deep beauty of the Litany of the Sacred Heart – a prayer he vowed to say every day.

With St. Alphonsus we become more conscious of the Cross. It is constantly in his writing. When he saw a nail, a rope, a thorn, he thought instantly and tenderly of the Passion. The Cross returns us to the nothingness that we are and yet it lifts us into eternity.

In many churches of the country a large, special cross is carried in church for the Stations. There is no corpus on the cross; each person is reminded that he must replace Christ on the cross. He must learn how to suffer and why he suffers. He must be an extension of Christ.

Christ has plunged Himself into humanity and wants us to make Him real today. He wants us to continue His Redemption, but this is done not by writing a good book, or organizing well, or by a great oration.

One is a Christian when he or she represents Christ, witnesses Christ. Deeply we surrender our will, not with a mere external offering like that of Cain, but with an internal – external oblation like that of Abel – like that of Christ. The external gift is a symbol of the internal giving. We represent Christ so perfectly that we become a mystery to those around us.

In the everyday romance of the world we pierce our valentines with an arrow. The Sacred Heart is the first, true Valentine sent by the Father. But His love is pictured by a heart and a cross rather than an arrow.

His heart is not only the symbol of love but the Cross of hope. The Cross is not the symbol of death; it is the symbol of life. The Stations do not end with a dead Christ in the tomb, but a glorious, living Christ on Easter Sunday, and always in our tabernacles.

He is every city’s most distinguished resident who invites His best friends constantly to take up your Cross and follow Me. The Cross is Christ’s way of identifying Himself and His own. Christians realize it is a gift, not a curse for with Dante ‘sorrow remarries us to God.

St. Francis de Sales on the company we keep: “Be very careful, therefore, dear reader, not to have any evil love, because you will in turn quickly become evil yourself.
Friendship is the most dangerous of all love. Why? Because other loves can exist without communication, exchange, closeness. But friendship is completely founded upon communication and exchange and cannot exist in practice without sharing in the qualities and defects of the friend loved.”

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What happened to Veronica’s veil was simply an outward expression of what happened in Veronica’s soul. Are we “Veronica’s” in our everyday life? Do we seek to serve, to encourage, to listen….?

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A Sense of Urgency ~ Passing Our Catholic Faith on to Our Family / New Podcast! ~ Seeing Christ in Our Spouse & Children

13 Monday Mar 2023

Posted by in by Leane Vdp, Family Life, Parenting, Podcasts - Finer Femininity, Sacramentals

≈ 2 Comments

by Leane VanderPutten

I don’t know about you, but oftentimes I can feel a sense of urgency in myself. Maybe one of the reasons is that I am not getting any younger and there is much to accomplish in a short amount of time.

But lately it has been more focused, this sense of importance as time keeps ticking on…

I know all of us have seen the ravages around us of lukewarm Catholicism.

I just listened to a Eucharistic conference and the statistics are grim of the belief in our Lord in the Holy Eucharist…very grim. A staggering 75-80% of Catholics do not believe in the Real Presence. We see casualness and indifference in the receiving of Him Who made us. And this is very widespread.

Were we to talk to an average Catholic, would they know how to say the rosary? Do they know about the importance of holy water, the scapular, St. Benedict medal and all the other treasures of our Faith?

Would they even believe in Purgatory??

It is a tragedy! They are not being taught!

That being so, it can be rather depressing to think of….and so, oftentimes, we don’t. After all, it is out of our hands.

Or is it?

Each day we have a priceless opportunity to pass on our Catholic Heritage to our family. Each day we wake to a brand new prospect of adding another stone to the foundation of the Faith in the little (and not so little) people in our lives. What are we doing about it?

I thought of this the other day as I filled up the Holy Water Fonts with Epiphany water. We aren’t always on top of this but lately it has been only me that remembers. I have older kids at home (the youngest is 17) and they are busy with many (good) things.

But it came home to me in rather a pressing way that I should be reminding them to bless themselves with Epiphany water on their way out the door. If I don’t impress on them the importance of this IMPORTANT tradition, they will not do it within their own homes…and the custom will die…with me.

Do we realize that, even though our own hearts may know these things, if we become lukewarm in passing this knowledge and these customs to our children, this radiant living of the Faith will die with us?

How unfortunate that would be!

So many opportunities will be lost.

Our children will lose out on gaining indulgences because they don’t know about them, of lighting blessed candles when there is a storm because they never thought of it, of celebrating Feast Days because it wasn’t done in their home, of offering Masses for our beloved dead because that wasn’t talked about.

They may not put on the Armor of God each day by saying their Morning Offering, using Holy water, wearing the scapular, the Miraculous and St. Benedict Medals…because they didn’t know.

The list goes on….

So, if we are going to get consumed with something, let it be the living of our Faith in our home. And let us pass this on to our families.

How? By living it in the home. It should be as natural as eating each day….talking about and living the faith.

Sure, there is only so much we can do. We don’t need to incorporate everything that is presented to us. That may make us crazy…which is not the goal.

But I do think we need to stand back and see if we have our priorities straight. Let us especially keep in the forefront of our life the learning, loving and living of our faith and this will, in turn, overflow into the lives of our families.

Maybe we should all be feeling that sense of urgency? Our family grows up quickly and will soon be forging their way into the world, hopefully following God’s will for them.

The greatest inheritance we can give them is the inheritance of a rich and positive experience of living our Catholic Faith in the home. Our Faith makes living worthwhile. And passing that on to our family is the very best gift we can give them.

And the greatest gift we can give our Holy Mother Church is faithful Catholics who continue to pass on the riches of our faith for generations to come.

There will be some things, of course, that very soon they will not want to do for her..dull, dreary things, fetching, cleaning, carrying. But these also they must be trained to do. The mother will often want to save time and trouble by doing them for herself, but if she does she will hurt her children’s character. She must train them young to work for others, to be unselfish, to give. -Dominican Nun, Australia, 1950’s

“Then, returning home, a husband can look upon his wife and children, or a wife upon her husband and children, and see Christ in them, and grasp something of the nobility and the deep goodness of Christian marriage and family life…”

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Read these pages, and you’ll embark on the ultimate journey of discovery into what happens to the soul after death. You’ll read true stories of the dead who have communicated to loved ones from the great beyond; you’ll learn how the saints described their mystical experiences, and you’ll investigate stunning supernatural phenomena that remain unexplained by science.

Notably, Don Dolindo provides proof for the existence of Purgatory and explains what it’s like for the souls suffering there. Moreover, he describes the consequences of sin and how the souls in Purgatory are awaiting our sacrificial suffering to be released into Paradise.

Best of all, Don Dolindo offers spiritual wisdom that you can apply to your daily life and shows you how to prepare for a holy death and the glory of the world to come. He describes the remarkable mystical experience of the soul’s awe-inspiring entrance into Heaven and explains the unique power of Our Blessed Mother to help us get there.

You’ll also learn:

  • The most important prayers that help free the Holy Souls in Purgatory
  • Why even venial sin impairs our relationship with God
  • Why good works, almsgiving, and penances are powerful atonements for sin
  • Why we need Our Lady’s maternity, humility, and love for souls
  • Why the saints delight in interceding for us
  • The sublime ecstasy and complete fulfillment that await us when we behold the Holy Trinity in Heaven

The rosary, scapulars, formal prayers and blessings, holy water, incense, altar candles. . . . The sacramentals of the Holy Catholic Church express the supreme beauty and goodness of Almighty God. The words and language of the blessings are beautiful; the form and art of statues and pictures inspire the best in us. The sacramentals of themselves do not save souls, but they are the means for securing heavenly help for those who use them properly. A sacramental is anything set apart or blessed by the Church to excite good thoughts and to help devotion, and thus secure grace and take away venial sin or the temporal punishment due to sin. This beautiful compendium of Catholic sacramentals contains more than 60,000 words and over 50 full color illustrations that make the time-tested sacramental traditions of the Church – many of which have been forgotten since Vatican II – readily available to every believer.

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Three Extraordinary Women ~ True Womanhood

10 Friday Mar 2023

Posted by in Family Life, Femininity vs Feminist

≈ 1 Comment

Do you not think you have influence. O Woman of Faith? Your very hidden life of courage and duty touches the lives of others and resounds throughout society, as has been the case all through history!

from True Womanhood – Rev. Bernard O’Reilly

When we remember who these early Christians were whose sweet and virginal piety was praised by St. Clement, we are filled with astonishment at the total and sudden transformation which the truth of the gospel, the knowledge and imitation of Christ and his Virgin Mother effected in the most ill-famed city of the pagan world and the most abandoned population known to history.

The very name of Corinth was odious to the ancient Romans of the true republican era, and when she (Corinth) fell beneath the Roman arms, she was utterly blotted out, lest the simplicity and austerity of the conquering race should become corrupt by contact with the voluptuous city.

Ancient_corinthA Roman colony was afterward planted there, and Corinth arose once more from her ruins on that enchanted shore, shorn indeed of her greatness and power, but scarcely less infamous than her former self.

It was like the alkali plains of our Western territories, where nothing seems able to grow but the sagebrush which saddens the eye. No sooner had St. Paul preached there, practicing all that he preached, than piety, purity, and modesty, all the gentle virtues of Mary’s home at Nazareth, spread with the faith from house to house in Corinth, till the infant church there resembled a society of angelic men and women.

In soil deemed hitherto incapable of producing a single fruit of heavenly modesty, the cross of Christ had been planted; the curse of centuries was removed, and the land began to be fair with flowers of supernatural promise.

What was the part of woman in this extraordinary renovation?

Three women are mentioned in the New Testament as having been associated with the apostles in the work of planting and fostering the Christian faith in the beautiful city and its dependencies…Prisca or Priscilla, Chloe, and Phebe, revered as saints from the apostolic times by the churches of the East and West alike.

It was in the house of Prisca that St. Paul took up his abode when he first arrived at Corinth. Her husband, Aquila, was, like Paul himself, a tent-maker; for it was the admirable custom, even of the highest and most wealthy Jewish families, to teach every one of their sons some trade or handicraft, which might place them above want, and thereby secure their independence, when persecution or adverse fortune deprived them of country and riches.

Aquila had been expelled from Rome by the Emperor Claudius just before Paul’s arrival on the Isthmus of Corinth, and was working at his craft of tent-maker, weaving for that purpose the hair of the Phrygian goat into a much esteemed and water-proof cloth.

Their common craft was a first bond of intimacy between the great apostle and this household; the Christian faith drew them still closer together. At any rate, though Priscilla and her husband opened their home and their hearts to the apostle and the divine message which he bore, we know from Paul himself that he would be beholden to no one for his support and that of his fellow-laborers in the gospel.

Still that laborious and well-ordered household became the cradle of Christianity in Western Greece, the first sanctuary in Corinth where the Divine Mysteries were celebrated, and the word of God explained to the highest and lowest among the proud, cultivated, and pleasure-loving population.

Not unlike Priscilla was Chloe, in all probability also a married woman, while Phebe, the female apostle of Cenchrese, the eastern suburb and seaport of Corinth, was unmarried, a deaconess, and the first fruits, on that long-polluted land, of the Virgin-Life destined to be so fruitful of holiness in Christian Europe.

Priscilla and her husband followed Paul to Ephesus in Asia, a city scarcely less ill-famed than Corinth, where the devoted and energetic wife shared the mortal dangers which beset the apostle, and instructed in the Christian faith the accomplished and eloquent Apollos, who was sent to Corinth to continue there the good work so gloriously begun.

When Paul was sent in chains to Rome, the noble woman and her worthy husband forsook every thing, risked even life itself to be near him, and to share his labors and perils.
Priscilla’ s house in Rome became a church, a center of Christian activity and charity, and Chloe and Phebe’ s names are associated with hers in the heartfelt commendations of the imprisoned apostle, and the undying gratitude and veneration of every succeeding age.

Most blessed, therefore, of God and man was the sweet and gentle piety as well as the unbounded hospitality of these early Christian homes.

When I suffer much, when things that are painful and disagreeable, befall me, instead of assuming an air of sadness, I respond by a smile. At first I was not always successful, but now it is a habit, which I am very happy to have acquired.

St. Francis de Sales gives us some words of warning on the company we keep: ‘Be very careful, therefore, dear reader, not to have any evil love, because you will in turn quickly become evil yourself.
Friendship is the most dangerous of all love. Why? Because other loves can exist without communication, exchange, closeness. But friendship is completely founded upon communication and exchange and cannot exist in practice without sharing in the qualities and defects of the friend loved.’

We should get used to extracting from ordinary day-to-day life whatever can increase our joy, rest, and legitimate satisfaction, and whatever can fill us with optimism. There is a thrill of joy and satisfaction in the thought that we are the objects of God’s love and can ourselves sincerely love Him…

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For adults….

The famous novelist Louis de Wohl presents a stimulating historical novel about the great St. Thomas Aquinas, set against the violent background of the Italy of the Crusades. He tells the intriguing story of St. Thomas who – by taking a vow of poverty and joining the Dominicans – defied his illustrious, prominent family’s ambition for him to have great power in the Church. The battles and Crusades of the 13th century and the ruthlessness of the excommunicated Emperor Frederick II play a big part in the story, but it is Thomas of Aquino who dominates this book. De Wohl succeeds notably in portraying the exceptional quality of this man, a fusion of mighty intellect and childlike simplicity. A pupil of St. Albert the Great, the humble Thomas – through an intense life of study, writing, prayer, preaching and contemplation – ironically rose to become the influential figure of his age, and he later was proclaimed by the Church as the Angelic Doctor.

Seriously wounded at the siege of Pamplona in 1521, Don Inigo de Loyola learned that to be a Knight of God was an infinitely greater honor (and infinitely more dangerous) than to be a Knight in the forces of the Emperor. Uli von der Flue, humorous, intelligent and courageous Swiss mercenary, was responsible for the canon shot which incapacitated the worldly and ambitious young nobleman, and Uli became deeply involved in Loyola’s life. With Juanita, disguised as the boy Juan, Uli followed Loyola on a pilgrimage to the Holy Land to protect him, but it was the saint who protected Uli and Juan. Through Uli’s eyes we see the surge and violence of the turbulent period in Jerusalem, Spain and Rome.

Louis de Wohl has again created an exciting and spiritually inspiring novel for all readers of historical fiction.

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Fr. Lasance Tidbits for Your Day ~ Reading/Faults of Those We Love, Etc.

28 Tuesday Feb 2023

Posted by in Family Life, Tidbits for Your Day, Virtues

≈ 1 Comment

by Father Lasance, My Prayer Book

Reading, a Molder of Character

The inspiration of a single book has made teachers, preachers, philosophers, authors, and statesmen.

The first book read by one has often appeared before him through life as a beacon which has saved him from many a danger. On the other hand, the demoralizing effects of one book have made profligates and criminals.

Many youths and adults now in prison trace the beginning of their downfall to the reading of a bad book.

A man’s character is shown by the books he reads.

Good books add to the happiness of a home. The true university of these days is a collection of books.-Carlyle

The Bible, “The Lives of the Saints,“ and “The Imitation of Christ “ought to be well thumbed.

It is quite reasonable to look for a Catholic magazine and a Catholic newspaper on the library table of the Catholic home.

The Catholic press ought to be supported by every Catholic family. It is a mighty apostolate; the good it does is incalculable.

The house is no home unless it contains food and fire for the mind as well as for the body.-Ossoli.

People are not usually better than the books they read.-Anonymous

There is no friend so faithful as a good book. There is no worse robber than a bad book.-Italian proverb

The books which help you most are those which make you think the most.-Theodore Parker.

A habit all should cultivate, is oft to read and ruminate.

Tears not how much but how well we read. -Anonymous

Books should to one of these four ends conduce:
For wisdom, piety, delight, or use.-Deham

The Faults of Those we Love

Who does not know, alas, the touching charm with which death envelops all memories? The faults of those who are gone are forgotten, for we have ceased to suffer from them.

We feel only the void which our loved ones have left, and however wayward their course, we can recall a time in their lives that was good, sentiments that were noble and touching. This period and these sentiments are our most vivid memories, and suffice to make us regret them.

Ah, why should we only discover the virtues of those who love us when it is too late to appreciate them, to enjoy them, and to let our loved ones see that we appreciate them!

Little Kindnesses

No single great deed is comparable to the multitude of little kindnesses performed by those unselfish souls who forget their own sorrows and, as true followers of Christ, scatter happiness on every side, and strew all life with hope and good cheer.

The Power of Silence

What a strange power there is in silence! How many resolutions are formed – how many sublime conquests effected during that pause when the lips are closed and the soul secretly feels the eye of her Maker upon her.

When some of these cutting, sharp, blighting words have been spoken, which send the hot indignant blood to the face and head, if those to whom they are addressed keep silent, look on with awe, for a mighty work is going on within them, and the spirit of evil or their guardian angel is very near to them in that hour.

During that pause they have made a step toward heaven or toward hell, and an item has been scored in the book which the Day of Judgment shall see opened.

They are the strong ones of the earth, the mighty forces for good or evil, those who know how to keep silence when it is a pain or grief to them.

Keep Your Eye on Heaven

If the sun is going down, look up at the stars; if the earth is dark, keep your eye on heaven. With God’s presence and God’s promises, anyone may be cheerful.

Use Your Gentlest Voice at Home

I would say to all: use your gentlest voice at home. Watch it day by day as a pearl of great price; for it will be worth more to you in days to come than the best pearl hid in the sea.

A kind voice is joy, like a lark’s song, to a hearth at home. Train it to sweet tones now, and it will keep in tune through life. -Elihu Burritt

St. Francis DeSales says:

“Accustom yourself in all that you do to act and speak gently and quietly, and you will see that in a short time you will completely control that abrupt impulsiveness.“

“Courage! Let us keep on in the low valleys of the little virtues. I love these three little virtues: gentleness of heart, firmness of mind, and simplicity of life.“

“Do not be quick to speak. Say much by a modest and judicious silence.“

“Great evenness of temper, continual gentleness, and suavity of heart are more rare than perfect charity, yet very desirable.“

In the world, on awakening in the morning, I used to think over what would probably occur, either pleasing or vexatious during the day; and if I foresaw only trying events, I arose dispirited.

Now it is quite the other way: I think of the difficulties and the sufferings that await me, and I rise the more joyous and full of courage, the more I foresee opportunities of proving my love for Jesus, and earning the living of my children – seeing that I am the mother of souls.

Then I kiss my crucifix, and lay it tenderly on the pillow while I dress, and I say to Him: “My Jesus, Thou has worked enough and wept enough during the three and thirty years of Thy life on this poor earth. Take now Thy rest… My turn it is to suffer and to fight.”

“Train up a child in the way he should go, And even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

We seek happiness in many things yet we aren’t really happy. Why? You have made us for yourself & our hearts are restless till they rest in you, O Lord.

❤️🌹Our first line of defense is the bond we must have with our husband. Besides our spiritual life, which gives us the grace to do so, we must put our relationship with our husband first. It is something we work on each day.

How do we do this? Many times it is just by a tweaking of the attitude, seeing things from a different perspective. It is by practicing the virtues….self-sacrifice, submission, thankfulness, kindness, graciousness, etc.

The articles in this maglet will help you with these things. They are written by authors that are solid Catholics, as well as authors with old-fashioned values….
Available here.
Pkg Deal on Catholic Wife’s Maglet and Catholic Young Lady’s Maglet available here.

Fr. Dolindo Ruotolo’s Surrender Prayer brought understanding and peace to countless souls amid the turbulence of the last century. Now, in our age of incomparable uncertainty, this miracle-worker and visionary writer offers the assurance you need to resolutely face the final things: death, judgment, Heaven, and Hell.

Read these pages, and you’ll embark on the ultimate journey of discovery into what happens to the soul after death. You’ll read true stories of the dead who have communicated to loved ones from the great beyond; you’ll learn how the saints described their mystical experiences, and you’ll investigate stunning supernatural phenomena that remain unexplained by science.

Notably, Don Dolindo provides proof for the existence of Purgatory and explains what it’s like for the souls suffering there. Moreover, he describes the consequences of sin and how the souls in Purgatory are awaiting our sacrificial suffering to be released into Paradise.

Best of all, Don Dolindo offers spiritual wisdom that you can apply to your daily life and shows you how to prepare for a holy death and the glory of the world to come. He describes the remarkable mystical experience of the soul’s awe-inspiring entrance into Heaven and explains the unique power of Our Blessed Mother to help us get there.

You’ll also learn:

    • The most important prayers that help free the Holy Souls in Purgatory
    • Why even venial sin impairs our relationship with God
    • Why good works, almsgiving, and penances are powerful atonements for sin
    • Why we need Our Lady’s maternity, humility, and love for souls
    • Why the saints delight in interceding for us
    • The sublime ecstasy and complete fulfillment that await us when we behold the Holy Trinity in Heaven

Archbishop Alban Goodier, S.J. fills in the many blanks in the historical narratives about the Passion of Jesus Christ with a riveting account based on history, culture and his own deep spiritual insights. He brings to life and unifies the many observations, emotions and subtle and not-so-subtle actions that revolve around the person of God the Son as he faces his most tragic and triumphant moment. The author’s unique approach intersperses Scripture accounts with the commentary of an incisive narrator who sifts and judges from the span of hundreds of years. He draws from the obvious as well as the obscure, and finds supernatural meaning in the most mundane actions that surround the suffering Christ. In the hands of this writer, the Lord’s few words, accompanied by the author’s commentary, challenge contemporary believers as much as they did those who first followed in the footsteps of Christ and his apostles.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

Our Lady’s Love of Domestic Life

31 Tuesday Jan 2023

Posted by in Family Life, Organization Skills, Virtues, Vocation

≈ 3 Comments

by Mother Mary Potter, Catholic Family Magazine, Australia

We do not think enough of this love of Mary for simple domestic life; indeed, we often forget it entirely. Yet it is one of the most beautiful traits in her character.

It seems the very essence of Mary, so to speak, to be simple, to perform the common, ordinary duties of a wife and a mother, and to love them. Her Heart ever craved after one thing, namely, to walk simply before God and to be perfect, whatever might be the circumstances or condition of her life.

But He gave her what her Heart most desired, the simple ordinary life of women, that she might live this life in her sweet, simple way, and sanctify it for the multitude of women who should follow her, that she might leave an example to her children, so sweet, so captivating, that they hereafter might love to walk in her footsteps; that she might be the pattern of a perfect woman to them.

And such indeed she is, and so sweet is her example, that the world seems made holier, purer by the very name of Mary.

Every good Catholic household seems penetrated with her influence, and perfumed by her presence. Her statues and pictures are everywhere, and everywhere remind us of herself, the pure simple Mary, the holy woman, the gentle Virgin, the Mother above all mothers.

But she ever comes before us in her own simplicity, that simplicity of Mary which is unlike anything else. There is nothing extraordinary about her in her outward conduct and demeanor, nothing excessive, nothing exaggerated.

She is a pure, true woman, lovely beyond conception; she is Mary, unlike aught but herself.

But for all that, holy Mother, we wish to be like thee, as far as we may; we wish to imitate thee; we will follow thee in the way thou hast shown us; our lives shall be in conformity to thine, so far as our weakness will permit.

If thou hadst done extraordinary things we might still have looked up to thee, longed to imitate thee, and should not have been able: but thou hast lived upon this earth as other women live, working no miracles, doing nothing marvelous, but for the greater part in the simple discharge of the duties of a quiet peaceful home, only so perfectly, with such exquisite purity of intention, with such ardent charity.

We, too, desire to live as thou hast done; thou wilt surely help thy children, tender Mother that thou art.

Mary is great as the Immaculate Virgin, she is great as the marvelous Mother of God, she is great as she stands on Calvary, offering the greatest sacrifice ever creature offered to God.

She offered what was her own, for Jesus was hers, He was her Son.

Mary is great as Queen of Heaven, but Mary is equally great in the eyes of God in the simple actions of her daily life, since in them she did God’s will as perfectly as she did when she consented to become His Mother.

We love Thee, Mary, as we watch thee, so quiet, so humble performing thy daily round of duties.

Each action was an offering, a gift, well pleasing to the Most High, each action was performed carefully, earnestly, as though it were an act of religious worship, and so indeed it was in Mary’s eyes.

Mary sanctified the daily acts of life, and in this her children can and must follow her example.

God is everywhere. He is adorable everywhere. He should be adored everywhere. We work in His presence always. It is with this thought ever in our minds that we should work.

It will not then matter to us what our work is; the smallest action will be performed as carefully as the greatest, and our life will be beautiful in the sight of God. Yes; it is not always what appears to us to be grand actions that are grand in the sight of God.

They are indeed grand when performed purely for the love of God; but these same heroic actions may be done from unworthy, selfish, interested motives, and not be so pleasing to God as some most commonplace, everyday actions proceeding from a purer motive.

Who can understand the joy of God in His saints, whose days are full of such noble actions as these?

We, too, naturally admire what is heroic and noble. See the applause that Grace Darling won for her one brave act in saving the lives of the poor, shipwrecked sailors; but that may have been no more pleasing in the sight of God than the simple daily actions of many a chosen soul, both in the world and in the cloister, dear to the Heart of God, “for man seeth those things that appear, but the Lord beholdeth the heart.”

If we could see our lives as those in heaven see them; if we could but see how beautiful to the angels and saints the lives appear of those who on earth are “all for God,” how differently should we feel, how differently should we act.

Do we think as we should of the quiet, simple life of Mary, full of its everyday, ordinary actions?

We have read of the saint who saw how a poor laborer was adding to his merit and his future crown in heaven by every brick he laid. Then what must Mary have done? What was the purity of intention of that poor bricklayer laying his bricks compared to the intention with which Mary worked at her needlework, drew water from the well for her little household, cleaned the house and its humble furniture, ant did all that was necessary for the simple poor cottage at Nazareth.

The angels never tired of gazing at their Queen as she went from one duty to the other in the simple routine of her life. She grew more and more wonderful to them, and they loved human life, seeing it such as they had ne’er before seen it, “life as Mary lived it.”

Let Mary’s children resolve to imitate their Mother; let them, wherever they may be, whether in the world or the cloister, resolve to imitate Mary by their cheerful, careful performance of their daily duties. Our Mother  is looking lovingly upon us. Let us think of her sweet, smiling face; let us earn from her the crown she is holding for us, which she is so anxious to bestow upon us, the reward the good God will give to all who are faithful to Him, and persevere in His service to the end.

Let us never grow weary of our work; let us never grow remiss; let us never yield to sloth. We shall not be able to work for God in heaven, we shall rest in Him there. Now is the time for toil and labor. Now is the time to show love for God by fulfilling His will, which is that we labor in the sweat of our brow in a spirit of penance, though at the same time with a spirit of joy that we are able thus to give gifts to our God, the gift of ourselves and ail our faculties.

Recollect that if the temptation of sloth is given way to, there is an end to sanctity for us. Recollect that if we begin to perform our actions hurriedly, as matters of slight import, we are in a state of delusion, and our final perseverance in the right way is doubtful.

As a tree is known by its fruits, so is the perfection of a soul known by its works; it is the one true criterion. Watch how persons perform their work, and you will know how near they are to God. You will know if Jesus be dwelling as King within them or not.

One who works carelessly, who throws things about untidily, who by thoughtlessness and carelessness creates disorder, that soul is not living in close union with Jesus.

God is so orderly, so perfect, so beautifully neat, if I may say so with reverence, in all His ways. I cannot imagine such a thing as an untidy or a slovenly saint, though, in some, doubtless, the poor body and its tidiness and cleanliness have been disregarded, but this was done from higher motives, and not from carelessness or love of dirt for its own sake.

If we are striving to make a home for Jesus in our hearts, to make His dwelling within us pleasing to Him, how carefully we shall work, how perfectly shall we strive to perform each action, with what a joyous, happy spirit, too.

Not in a dull and slavish way; our service will not be a forced and oppressive, but a very cheerful, happy one; since all our actions will be offered to God, all our acts will be acts of love.

We shall love our life of love and labor, and it is the Mother of fair love who will infuse this love into us, who will help her children to work in the same spirit as she did, who will send angels to assist them if they try to do their part, who will herself teach them the best way of performing their daily duties.

Oh, lovely Mother, Queen of Angels, send thy holy angels to watch over thy children, and make them to live on earth as God’s earthly angels, well pleasing in His sight and most dear to Him.

If Mary’s children, then, would have their hearts in union with their Mother’s Heart, they, too, must love domestic life, home life; they must consider home as their place of work, and love it; they must think that their principal work is to make home happy; they must live in their household as Mary lived in hers; they must put their heart in all they do; they must make all their works acts of love, as Mary did; and God will bless those homes where the spirit of Mary thus lives.

May there be many such homes in this world, that God may love it as in the beginning, when He blessed it and pronounced it good.

 

 

“Lord, Help me to be a good wife. I fully realize that I don’t have what it takes to be one without Your help. Take my selfishness, impatience, and irritability and turn them into kindness, long-suffering, and the willingness to bear all things. Take my old emotional habits, mindsets, automatic reactions, rude assumptions, and self-protective stance, and make me patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle, and self-controlled. Take the hardness of my heart and break down the walls with Your battering ram of revelation. Give me a new heart and work in me Your love, peace, and joy. I am not able to rise above who I am at this moment. Only You can transform me.” -The Power of a Praying Wife

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Here is a marriage blueprint that every woman can follow. Happy marriages do not just happen, they are made. It takes three parties to make a good marriage; the husband, the wife, and the Lord. This book is concerned with helping the woman to become the wife desired and therefore loved that every man worth having wishes to find and keep.<P> This book sold over a quarter of a million copies shortly after its publication in 1951, and it was read by Catholics and non-Catholics alike. It is a practical manual. It should be read by every woman considering entering the matrimonial state and also by those women who are already married. It can also be read by men who may wish to see what a real challenge it is for a woman to live up to their expectations and how grateful they should be if they are blessed to find the woman of their desires…

Armed with Barbeau s wisdom, you’ll grow closer to your wife and to your children, while deepening your love for God. You’ll be able to lead your family to holiness amidst the troubles and temptations that threaten even the best of families today: infidelity, divorce, materialism, loneliness, and despair.

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A Beautiful and Happy Home

17 Tuesday Jan 2023

Posted by in Attitude, Family Life, Kindness

≈ 2 Comments

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What do you think makes a beautiful and happy home? How important is this?

Having a happy home is crucial to the spreading of our faith. To whom do we want to spread our faith? First of all, to our children. They need to see the deep and lasting beauty of our faith shining forth in our everyday lives, making our home beautiful and happy. Our faith should be the undercurrent in the everyday bubbling brook, that flows into every facet of our lives.

This happiness does not have to be unrealistic. Life is what it is and there are many days where the smiles don’t come as easy and nerves are rawer because of whatever is upsetting the apple cart at the time. These are opportunities too.

Father Curtis,  over this past weekend, said that if our kids see ONLY that life is perfect at home, if they grow  up wearing rose-colored glasses all the time, they are going to get quite a jolt when they enter into their own vocation and it is less than perfect…and it will be. So it is good that the kids see reality, too.

That being said, we need to create a home that is joyful and lovely, in amongst the “real”-ness.

J.R. Miller gives us a lovely analogy of moss on an old thatch of a ruin, comparing it to the love that surrounds and covers a multitude of sins and makes an imperfect home, with imperfect souls dwelling therein, a fortress of beauty and happiness.

SECRETS OF HAPPY HOME LIFE – J.R. Miller

Few things we can do in this world are so well worth doing as the making of a beautiful and happy home. He who does this builds a sanctuary for God and opens a fountain of blessing for men.
Far more than we know do the strength and beauty of our lives depend upon the home in which we dwell. He who goes forth in the morning from a happy, loving, prayerful home, into the world’s strife, temptation, struggle, and duty, is strong — inspired for noble and victorious living.

The children who are brought up in a true home go out trained and equipped for life’s battles and tasks, carrying in their hearts a secret of strength which will make them brave and loyal to God, and will keep them pure in the world’s sorest temptations.

We may all do loving service, therefore, by helping to make one of the world’s homes — the one in which we dwell — brighter and happier. No matter how plain it may be, nor how old-fashioned, if love be in it, if prayer connect it with heaven, if Christ’s benediction be upon it, it will be a transfigured spot. Poverty is no cross if the home be full of bright cheer. Hardest toil is light if love sings its songs amid the clatter.

“Dear Moss,” said the thatch on an old ruin, ” I am so worn, so patched, so ragged, really I am quite unsightly. I wish you would come and cheer me up a little. You will hide all my infirmities and defects; and, through your loving sympathy, no finger of contempt or dislike will be pointed at me.”

“I come,” said the moss; and it crept up and around, and in and out, till every flaw was hidden, and all was smooth and fair. Presently the sun shone out, and the old thatch looked bright and fair, a picture of rare beauty, in the golden rays.

“How beautiful the thatch looks!” cried one who saw it. “How beautiful the thatch looks! “said another. “Ah!” said the old thatch, “rather let them say, ‘ how beautiful is the loving moss!’ For it spends itself in covering up all my faults, keeping the knowledge of them all to herself, and, by her own grace, making my age and poverty wear the garb of youth and luxuriance.”

So it is that love covers the plainness and the ruggedness of the lowliest home. It hides its dreariness and its faults. It softens its roughness. It changes its pain into profit, and its loss into gain.

Let us live more for our homes. Let us love one another more. Let us cease to complain, criticize, and contradict each other. Let us be more patient with each other’s faults. Let us not keep back the warm, loving words that lie in our hearts, until it is too late for them to give comfort. Soon separations will come. One of every wedded pair will stand by the other’s coffin and grave. Then every bitter word spoken, and every neglect of love’s duty, will be as a thorn in the heart.

 
“Be merry, really merry. The life of a true Christian should be a perpetual jubilee….A prelude to the Festivals of Eternity.”
-St. Theophane Venard
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Father Francis Finn SJ was an early 20th-century Jesuit priest who wrote delightful children’s stories about life in Jesuit boarding schools. Taken from his years of experience teaching Catholic boys, Father Finn writes about various human personalities with warmth and humor that makes for enjoyable reading for all types.

This delightful story centers on 10-year-old Tom Playfair who is quite a handful for his well-meaning but soft-hearted aunt. Mr. Playfair, his widowed father, decides to ship his son off to St. Maure’s boarding school–an all-boys academy run by Jesuits–to shape him up, as well as to help him make a good preparation for his upcoming First Communion. Tom is less than enthusiastic, but his adventures are just about to begin. Life at St. Maure’s will not be dull as the reader will soon find out…

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The story opens upon Claude Lightfoot, a reckless 12 year old boy who constantly acts first and thinks later. After being in clash with some bullies, Claude is obliged to miss his First Communion. In the course of the story, Fr. Finn manages to cover a host of topics, including smoking, drinking, the devil, Confession, Holy Communion, retaining one s Baptismal innocence, the 9 First Fridays, the priesthood, mothers and sisters, truthfulness, lying, courage, effeminacy, atheism, sacrilege, baseball, Americanism (true and false), Latin, virtue, honor, leadership, etc.

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The Keys to Mutual Love ~ Fr. George Kelly

22 Tuesday Nov 2022

Posted by in Catholic Family Handbook, Rev. George A. Kelly, Family Life, Virtues

≈ 1 Comment

 

by Father George Kelly. The Catholic Marriage Manual

To succeed at any vocation, you must have patience, a determination to learn, a willingness to put aside momentary desires for the sake of final success. The vocation of marriage is no exception. It requires hard work. In fact, it is probably the hardest job of all.

For example, consider what a wife and mother must be. She must be an inspiring companion to her husband. She must be a housekeeper who has some skill in cooking, sewing and cleaning. She must be something of an economist, able to handle her household budget and to shop efficiently for food, furnishings and clothing.

She must be proficient in the feeding and physical care of her children. She must be a nurse. She must be a teacher with a working knowledge of child psychology to discipline her youngsters properly.

In addition to the actual skills needed for the successful performance of these jobs, she requires spiritual and emotional qualities —patience, tolerance, understanding, kindness, gentility, fortitude, prudence.

The successful husband and father needs similar qualities. To inspire respect for his leadership he should be reasonably competent as a man: he must be the head of the family; he must be a provider for his wife and children.

He must be a source of inspiration to his wife, encouraging her to fulfill her duties as wife and mother. He, too, must be a teacher, for his example will probably be the most important influence in the development of his son’s personality.

He also requires insights into the spiritual and emotional needs of his wife and children. He requires high resolutions and a strong sense of duty to meet those needs.

Since it is obvious that a man and woman need so many qualities to succeed as husband and wife and as father and mother, why do so many take the marriage vows without really knowing what will be expected of them?

Even couples who have lived together for years sometimes fail to realize how many adjustments they must make and how much self-discipline they must impose if their marriage is to weather future difficulties successfully.

Listen to the dreamy popular songs on the radio, read the romantic novels in many magazines, and view the love stories portrayed on television or in the movies. Seldom will you find even a vague suggestion that the vocation of marriage requires unremitting hard work by both partners.

Problems that arise in marriage as portrayed on television are almost always solved in time for the final commercial. Popular songs convey a constant impression that personality conflicts can be washed away in the sea of sex.

Even articles on marriage in popular magazines and books, seriously intended to help couples achieve better adjustment, often introduce a typical problem and, a few sentences later, report how the couple, by performing a magic act like visiting a marriage counselor, correct all past difficulties and live happily thereafter.

Few publications emphasize that mutual sacrifice is essential to marital success.

In that magnificent little volume The Imitation of Christ, compiled by Thomas Kempis in the fifteenth century, it is written: “Unless thou deny thyself, thou shalt not have perfect liberty.”

Those words might be studied by every married person. Unless you practice severe self-discipline and subjugate your own desires, striving instead to fulfill the needs of your spouse and children, you cannot gain the full happiness of marriage.

Despite what the movies say, no one “finds” happiness. If you obtain it at all, you must earn it. And it will be earned only by what the Catholic marriage ritual calls “the great principle of self-sacrifice.”

On your wedding day you surrendered your individual lives in the interest of a deeper and wider common life. From that day forward you belonged to each other. You were expected to become one in mind, one in heart, and one in affections.

And as the ritual counseled: “Whatever sacrifices you may hereafter be required to make to preserve this common life, always make them generously.”

Does this mean that we must picture married life in grim, terrifying colors? Not a bit! Sacrifice is difficult and irksome only in the absence of love.

Love makes it easy, and the more perfect the love, the more joy in the sacrifice.

When two people learn to bear patiently with marriage and with each other, marital harmony is the result. And this meeting of minds is the greatest source of happiness humans can obtain on earth.

No earthly pleasure can match that which the loving husband gives his wife, the wife gives her husband, or children give their parents. Very few people indeed appreciate that it is the warm and living union of two persons which alone gives life its full meaning.

“Where is the busy mother who cannot find time enough to spend thus a few moments every night with each child before it falls asleep, in sweet, loving talk; and tender, earnest prayer? Far down into the years, the memory of such sacred moments will go, proving thousands of times a light in darkness, an inspiration in discouragement, a secret of victory in hard struggle, a hand to restrain from sin in time of fierce temptation.” -J.R. Miller

 

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Why do we wear our best clothes on Sunday? What was the Holy Ghost Hole in medieval churches? How did a Belgian nun originate the Feast of the Blessed Sacrament? Where did the Halloween mask and the jack-o’-lantern come from?

Learn the answer to these questions, as well as the history behind our traditional celebration of Thanksgiving, in this gem of a book by Father Weiser.

Celebrate the Faith with your kids all year round!

For over half a century, Catholic families have treasured the practical piety and homespun wisdom of Mary Reed Newland’s classic of domestic spirituality, The Year and Our Children. With this new edition, no longer will you have to search for worn, dusty copies to enjoy Newland’s faithful insights, gentle lessons, and delightful stories. They’re all here, and ready to be shared with your family or homeschooling group. Here, too, you ll find all the prayers, crafts, family activities, litanies, and recipes that will help make your children ever-mindful of the beautiful rhythm of the Church calendar.This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

Is It Time to Talk to a Priest?

23 Friday Sep 2022

Posted by in Family Life, FF Tidbits

≈ 3 Comments

Two short anecdotes today on why a priest may be qualified to give marital advice and then what qualifications to look for in a priest.

by Daniel A. Lord, Questions I’m Asked About Marriage

What right has an unmarried priest, bound by the vows of celibacy, to give advice and counsel on marriage?

Do you recall the story of the literary critic who was taunted because he who had never written a novel had the presumption to criticize novels and novelists? The critic’s answer was brief but to the point: “I don’t know how to lay an egg, but I do know how to tell a good omelet from a bad one.”

A priest is remarkably well-equipped to discuss marriage problems, for:

1. The fact that he himself is unmarried permits him to view marriage without prejudice or bias.

2. In his own field the priest is in a position somewhat analogous to that of a physician or a lawyer. The success of a physician does not depend on his having had the disease that he is trying to cure in his patient.

The success of a lawyer does not depend on his having been in a difficulty similar to the one from which he is trying to extricate his client.

Quite the contrary. Both the physician and the lawyer are experts. Each has been trained in his professions. The healthier the physician, the better fitted he is to care for his patient; the more law-abiding the lawyer, the more able he is to satisfy his clients.

And the priest, who is trained to handle the problems that arise from human relationships, has the right to give advice and counsel on marriage, because:

    a. His knowledge of moral theology shows him all angles of love and marriage as they have presented themselves in all ages and as they have been interpreted by the Church.

    b. His studies in pastoral theology have trained him in the sympathetic approach to and understanding of human relationships.

    c. His reading of professional priestly journals keeps him currently informed on the newest thought and developments in this field.

3. His priestly experience gives him a very decided advantage. Many people, married and single, tell him of their problems and difficulties and often of the solutions which they themselves have worked out. Innumerable people come to him to talk to him, to consult him, to work out with his advice their life vocations.

4. The priest has another decided advantage: He can draw on the rich experience of Holy Mother Church, who for twenty centuries has been deeply concerned with human happiness and with the promotion of all that makes life less difficult and more satisfying.

Every resource of the Church is at the priest’s command, and those who seek his advice and counsel are thereby benefited.

When a priest gives advice or counsel on love or marriage, he is not offering his private judgment on these matters; he is speaking with the age-old, world-wise experience of the Church of Christ.

From Light and Peace, Quadrupani

When choosing a director, be careful to select one who has the necessary qualifications. He should be not only virtuous, but prudent, charitable and learned. St. Francis de Sales gives the following opinion on the subject:

“Go,” said Tobias to his son, when about to send him into a strange country, ‘go seek some wise man to conduct you.’ I say the same to you, Philothea. If you sincerely desire to enter upon the way of devotion, seek a good guide to direct you therein.

This advice is of the utmost importance and necessity. Whatever one may do, says the devout Avila, he can never be certain of fulfilling God’s will, unless he practice that humble obedience which the saints so strongly recommend and to which they so faithfully adhere.

And the Scriptures tell us: ‘A faithful friend is a strong defense: and he that hath found him, hath found a treasure: … a faithful friend is the medicine of life [5] and immortality: and they that fear the Lord shall find one.’ (Ecclesiasticus, c. VI, vv. 14-16.)

But who can find such a friend? They that fear God, the Wise Man answers—that is to say, those humble souls who ardently desire their spiritual progress.

Since it is so essential, then, Philothea, to have a skillful guide in the devout life, ask God fervently to give you one according to His Heart, and rest assured that when an angel is necessary to you as to the young Tobias, He will give you a wise and faithful director.

In fact, the selection once made, you should look upon your spiritual guide more as a guardian angel than as a mere man. You place your confidence not in him but in God, for it is God who will lead and instruct you through his instrumentality by inspiring him with the sentiments and words necessary for your guidance. Thus you may safely listen to him as to an angel sent from heaven to lead you there.

To this confidence, add perfect candor. Speak quite frankly and tell him unreservedly all that is good, all that is evil in you, for the good will thus be strengthened, the evil weakened, and your soul shall thereby become firmer in its sufferings and more moderate in its consolations.

Great respect should also be united with confidence and in such nice proportion that the one shall not lessen the other: let your confidence in him be such as a respectful daughter reposes in her father, your respect for him such as that with which a son confides in his mother. In a word, this friendship, though strong and tender, should be altogether sacred and spiritual in its nature.

‘Choose one among a thousand,’ says Avila: “among ten thousand, rather, I should say, for there are fewer than one would suppose fitted for this office of spiritual director. Charity, learning and prudence are indispensable to it, and if any one of these qualities be absent, your choice will not be unattended with danger.

I repeat, ask God to inspire your selection and when you have made it thank Him sincerely, and then remain constant to your decision. If you go to God in all simplicity and with humility and confidence, you will undoubtedly obtain a favorable answer to your petition.”

The truly religious wife finds God at Mass and from Him receives the strength to become the ideal helpmate to her husband. She does not leave God at church but keeps Him with her every minute of the day in every nook and cranny of her home. Each menial, repetitious task she must perform is a work of love for her husband and children, and through them, a work of love for her Creator. – Fr. Raoul Plus, S.J. 1950’s, The Wife Desired (afflink)

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In With God in Russia, Ciszek reflects on his daily life as a prisoner, the labor he endured while working in the mines and on construction gangs, his unwavering faith in God, and his firm devotion to his vows and vocation. Enduring brutal conditions, Ciszek risked his life to offer spiritual guidance to fellow prisoners who could easily have exposed him for their own gains. He chronicles these experiences with grace, humility, and candor, from his secret work leading mass and hearing confessions within the prison grounds, to his participation in a major gulag uprising, to his own “resurrection”—his eventual release in a prisoner exchange in October 1963 which astonished all who had feared he was dead.

Powerful and inspirational, With God in Russia captures the heroic patience, endurance, and religious conviction of a man whose life embodied the Christian ideals that sustained him…..

Captured by a Russian army during World War II and convicted of being a “Vatican spy,” Jesuit Father Walter J. Ciszek spent 23 agonizing years in Soviet prisons and the labor camps of Siberia. Only through an utter reliance on God’s will did he manage to endure the extreme hardship. He tells of the courage he found in prayer–a courage that eased the loneliness, the pain, the frustration, the anguish, the fears, the despair. For, as Ciszek relates, the solace of spiritual contemplation gave him an inner serenity upon which he was able to draw amidst the “arrogance of evil” that surrounded him. Ciszek learns to accept the inhuman work in the infamous Siberian salt mines as a labor pleasing to God. And through that experience, he was able to turn the adverse forces of circumstance into a source of positive value and a means of drawing closer to the compassionate and never-forsaking Divine Spirit.

He Leadeth Me is a book to inspire all Christians to greater faith and trust in God–even in their darkest hour. As the author asks, “What can ultimately trouble the soul that accepts every moment of every day as a gift from the hands of God and strives always to do his will?”
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The In-Laws ~ An Ernest Plea

17 Wednesday Aug 2022

Posted by in Family Life, Marriage

≈ 1 Comment

by Fr. Robert Nash, S.J., Marriage Before and After, 1952

“A man’s enemies,” Our Lord tells us, ” are those of his own household.”

We have talked about some of them—bad temper, jealousy, suspicion. But over and above the causes of dissension from within, there are also foes from without whose business in life would seem to be to upset the peace and union which should reign in the family. They are commonly known as the ” in-laws ” and it is notorious that they are possessed of a villainous power to wreck married happiness and drive a wedge between a man and his wife.

Wrecking a Home

Now it is very clearly recognized that there are ” in-laws ” who do not for a moment come up for consideration when obstacles to married union are being discussed. They wish the married parties well and they show it. They are the soul of generosity and thoughtfulness. They would resent like a blow in the face any disparaging tale about man or wife and they would be the first to contradict it and prove, and with spirit, that it was a calumny. But with these we are not concerned except to commend them and pray that their number may increase and multiply.

There are other ” in-laws,” though, aren’t there?

There are “in-laws ” who seem incapable of allowing you to manage your own affairs in your own house and family—they resent it if you do not act on their suggestions, orders I had nearly said.

There are “in-laws” who try to give you the impression that in marrying their sister or brother or daughter or son, you have taken the entire family under your wing. The idea seems to be that you have entered upon an alliance with the whole of them, so you are expected to entertain them and house them without protest.

You are barely a month married when dear mother-in-law pilots herself into the horizon and proceeds to park herself with you, with a naivete that disarms you, for what threatens to be an indefinite period. When she does finally move off, sister-in-law’s turn comes, and when she decides to depart, she thinks well to bear away with her your partner who evidently needs a change. It looks as if the ” in-laws ” are taking over.

Unless you are strong there is certainly going to be trouble. They can brew a storm and it is matter of history that they have been known to sow the seeds of unhealthy and unwarranted suspicion in the heart of a guileless and hitherto unsuspecting partner.

A wife is wise who lets it be clearly seen from the start that now her husband has first claim. A husband is a good judge if he be not too ready to share confidences with his own family rather than with his wife. Both will contribute no small measure to their union and unanimity by trying to solve their own domestic problems and keeping within the circle of their own home the secrets and passing difficulties, which, as we saw, are inevitable where people are living together.

An Earnest Plea

And may I insert a parenthesis for the “in-laws” though these pages are not primarily concerned with them? May I implore you to leave the married couple alone and let them manage their own affairs? Your meddlesome interference is certainly going to add fuel to flame.

And may I say the same to all tale-bearers, busy-bodies, slanderers; to those who suspect only and speak as if they were sure; to those who weave the fabric of a detailed calumny out of the thinnest shreds of evidence? Your words may open a breach between man and wife which will take years to bridge over, if indeed the evil done does not prove to be irreparable.

Your thoughtless yarn or insinuating remark, like the stone flung into the lake, may send ripples of discord far and wide over a hitherto peaceful and blissfully happy surface. Beware! And don’t you forget either that you must answer to God for this sin and its consequences.

As an antidote to all these disrupting influences, whether they come from within or from without, one would like to recommend strongly the cultivation of little attentions between man and wife. These, for all their smallness, are great and lasting in their results:

The kiss when husband is going out to business in the morning and when he returns in the evening; the care on husband’s part to avoid throwing cigarette ashes on wife’s carpet or clean tablecloth; the felt slippers placed by wife near the fender for husband when he comes home tired, and the smile of appreciation or word of thanks from him as he puts them on.

The restraint carefully exercised to avoid any reference to a topic that is unpleasant or dangerous unless such reference be absolutely necessary; the smile of welcome with which wife awaits husband’s return, a smile which perhaps disguises some secret loneliness or disappointment – the little treat for the tea which he buys on the way home and which is sure to call forth a cheer front the youngsters.

The birthday present remembered, though the date was not mentioned beforehand, and deliberately so as to give the pleasanter surprise—these are a few of the thousand little devices which foster in the family that spirit of mutual affection pleaded for in this section of our notes.

The resulting union between all in the home will be a faithful reflex of the first quality found in the ` perfect family at Nazareth. The first link in the chain is being forged of purest gold.

“There is beauty all around when there’s love at home.”

Alice von Hildebrand – “St. Francis de Sales tells us that pious women should be well-dressed, but this doesn’t mean they must become slaves of fashion. There’s a way of dressing which is attractive, even elegant, but at the same time modest and simple. More importantly, attractiveness shouldn’t be reserved for guests and those you meet outside the home, while you ‘let yourself go’ when you’re at home. The moment a couple marries, they should begin to try always to be at their best for each other, physically (and above all) spiritually.”

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A must-read for the married and those considering marriage! This guidebook to finding a happy marriage, keeping a happy marriage, and raising happy children has been out of print for over 50 years…until now! From the master of the spiritual life, Raoul Plus, S.J., it contains loads of practical and spiritual advice on family life. Have you been looking for a handbook on marriage and raising children that is based on truth? You’ve found it!

The saints assure us that simplicity is the virtue most likely to draw us closer to God and make us more like Him.

No wonder Jesus praised the little children and the pure of heart! In them, He recognized the goodness that arises from an untroubled simplicity of life, a simplicity which in the saints is completely focused on its true center, God.

That’s easy to know, simple to say, but hard to achieve.

For our lives are complicated and our personalities too. (We even make our prayers and devotions more complicated than they need be!)

In these pages, Fr. Raoul Plus provides a remedy for the even the most tangled lives.

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Do Your Part and Trust in God’s Help

29 Wednesday Jun 2022

Posted by in Catholic Family Handbook - Fr. Lovasik, Catholic Home Life, Family Life

≈ 3 Comments

It IS interesting, isn’t it, how, in the last decades, women are made to feel as if they are being “losers”, “nobodys” if they are dedicated to the home. They are not using their talents if they aren’t out working in the world.

Truly, I find that illogical. How many talents does it make to run a pleasant home, raise good children, have a healthy relationship with someone you rub shoulders with night and day? That, in itself, is a full-time job…not to mention if some are homeschooling, seeking out healthy alternatives, helping with their parish life, etc., etc.

No, it takes a brave, committed, responsible, hard-working adult to do what it takes to raise a Godly family in today’s society.

And for those women who have to work on top of all that, what a load, indeed! My own mother had to work for a period in our lives and it was very difficult!

Father Lovasik, in this excerpt, talks about happiness in marriage, and how it must be worked for…

Painting by John Sloane

by Father Lovasik, The Catholic Family Handbook

Happiness in marriage must be earned. It is something you must work out for yourself, chiefly by forgetting yourself and serving others.

Marriage involves the art of human relations, the psychology of children, the economics of running a home, the maintenance of health, but, above all, the development of the moral and spiritual life of the family.

All this demands a wide range of talents and skill. No marriage is a success unless less you make it so, and that takes persistent effort and, still more, a constant and humble reliance on God.

The supreme object of your effort and striving is the family. You worked and saved in order that you might be married and have a home of your own. Once married, you worked and saved that you might successfully bring up a family.

Your purpose in Matrimony should be to bring God’s children into the world and rear them properly, to be one in body and spirit, and to make a happy home. You are to help one another and your children in every possible way, especially to get to Heaven, which is the final and eternal destiny for us all.

You and your spouse must be willing to work at marriage as the greatest job of your lives and not desert when problems arise. When you married, each of you took on a responsibility for some part of the work that goes into the making of a home.

Both assume the responsibility of encouraging and helping the other, insofar as is possible, in the specific tasks designed for each.

The training of children is the mutual responsibility of both husband and wife. Thus, marriage is very much a fifty-fifty proposition. Only when you are willing to bear your share of the burdens of married life can you hope to have real love and peace.

Marriage is normally a source of equilibrium for you, because cause it brings you legitimate and healthy pleasures. But equilibrium always consists of an effort to impose the guidance of reason upon all your activities.

Welcome without narrow-mindedness and weakness the joy marriage offers; use your reason in meeting the difficulties that marriage inevitably entails.

If your temperament is inherently unstable, if your life is weighed down with unfavorable conditions, you can recover the health of your emotional and spiritual life only if you seek above all what is right according to the sane reason that God has given you, providing, of course, that you make yourself do it.

Only this effort can bring you the joy that is worthy of you.

At any rate, she has by nature the power, the art, and the disposition to please, to soothe, to charm, and to captivate. It is a wonderful power; and we see daily women exerting it in a wonderful way. Why will not women who are truly good, or who sincerely strive to be so, not make it the chief study of their lives to find out and acquire the sovereign art of making their influence as healthful, as cheering, as blissful as the sunlight and the warmth are to their homes? – Rev Bernard O’Reilly, True Womanhood, 1894 http://amzn.to/2mPm81e (afflink)

 

 

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Women historically have been denigrated as lower than men or viewed as privileged. Dr. Alice von Hildebrand characterizes the difference between such views as based on whether man’s vision is secularistic or steeped in the supernatural. She shows that feminism’s attempts to gain equality with men by imitation of men is unnatural, foolish, destructive, and self-defeating. The Blessed Mother’s role in the Incarnation points to the true privilege of being a woman. Both virginity and maternity meet in Mary who exhibits the feminine gifts of purity, receptivity to God’s word, and life-giving nurturance at their highest.

You’ll learn how to grow in wisdom and in love as you encounter the unglamorous, everyday problems that threaten all marriages. As the author says: If someone were to give me many short bits of wool, most likely I would throw them away. A carpet weaver thinks differently. He knows the marvels we can achieve by using small things artfully and lovingly. Like the carpet weaver, the good wife must be an artist of love. She must remember her mission and never waste the little deeds that fill her day the precious bits of wool she s been given to weave the majestic tapestry of married love.

This remarkable book will show you how to start weaving love into the tapestry of your marriage today, as it leads you more deeply into the joys of love.

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