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Category Archives: Hospitality

The Wife, The Dispenser of Hospitality

23 Monday Aug 2021

Posted by Leanevdp in Hospitality, True Womanhood, A book of Instruction for Women of the World, Rev. Bernard O'Reilly, L.D., 1893

≈ 3 Comments

From True Womanhood, Rev. Bernard O’Reilly, 1893

To the wife’s stewardship belongs also the discharge of a most important, not to say most sacred duty—that of hospitality. It is one of the chief functions of the divine virtue of charity.

Of its nature, its necessity, and its importance we do not wish to discourse here. Few are the homes and the hearts to which hospitality is a stranger. Those to which this book may reach will easily understand what the word means without either definition or description.

We can, therefore, convey our instruction by the simplest method. Whoever is received into your home as a guest—precisely because he is your guest—forget everything else to make his stay delightful.

It matters little whether persons thus hospitably received may or may not appreciate your generosity, your cordiality, and that true warmth of a welcome like yours, inspired by Christian motives much more than by worldly reasons; it matters much for you that none should ever enter your home without finding it a true Christian home, or should leave it without taking away with them the pleasant memory of their stay and a grateful recollection of you and yours.

Doubtless some will be found whom no courtesy, no kindness, no warmth of hospitality can change from what they are,—little-minded, narrow-hearted, selfish, cold, and unable to judge the conduct of others by any other standard than their own low thoughts and sentiments.

They are only like bats entering a banquet-hall by one window and passing out at the opposite, after having fluttered blindly about the lights, or clung for a few instants to the walls or the ceiling. Let them come and let them go. The social and spiritual atmosphere of the place is not for them.

Nor must you complain of the number. It is wonderful how much place a large-hearted woman can find for her company, even in a very small house!

A hospitable spirit can do wonders in its way: it can make the water on the board more delicious than the wines of Portugal, Spain, or France or Italy; it can make the bread which it places before stranger or friend as sweet as the food of the gods; it can multiply its own scanty stores—as the Master did with the loaves in the wilderness.

For God’s blessing is with the hospitable soul to increase, to multiply, and to sweeten; to fill all who sit at her board with plenty, with joy, with thanksgiving.

“There is,” says Digby, “a castle on the Loire held by a lady of ascetic piety and of noble fame, in the latest pages of French heroic annals. There one of my friends, received to hospitality, finding many guests, supposed himself surrounded by men of illustrious condition, till he was informed that they were all persons reduced to poverty, whose title to familiarity under that roof was founded precisely on their indigence and misfortunes.”

Ah, noble France, how many other homes along the Loire, the Mayenne, the Sarthe, and the Somme do we not know which are always open to the stranger and the pilgrim from other lands, while their generous masters and mistresses deem every sacrifice a blessing, because performed for Christ present in the guest of one day, or one week, or one month!

A man does not expect his wife to neglect important duty in his behalf. He is aware of the demands of her life and wants her to give each responsibility the attention it requires. He does not want his children to suffer neglect. And he knows she is entitled to other interests and diversions. But, he doesn’t want to be less important. And he doesn’t want to be regarded as a convenience, a paycheck, an escort, a social asset, a ticket to security. He would like to feel that she married him for him, and not as a means of filling her needs or reaching her objectives. -Helen Andelin, Fascinating Womanhood

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Review: For the spiritually-conscious couple this book is a must. Written in the 1920’s by a Catholic priest to counsel married couples on sexual morality, daily problems and child rearing.
Among many wonderful lessons, it describes plainly what I needed to know about which birth-control method is moral and which is immoral, from a Traditional Roman Catholic point of view.

A Frank, Yet Reverent Instruction on the Intimate Matters of Personal Life for Young Men. To our dear and noble Catholic youths who have preserved, or want to recover, their purity of heart, and are minded to retain it throughout life. For various reasons many good fathers of themselves are not able to give their sons this enlightenment on the mysteries of life properly and sufficiently. They may find this book helpful in the discharge of their parental responsibilities in so delicate a matter.

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The Spirit of Hospitality – Emilie Barnes

08 Thursday Oct 2020

Posted by Leanevdp in by Emilie Barnes, Hospitality, Virtues

≈ 1 Comment

The following little story about the Gift of Hospitality struck a chord with me.

Like Emilie Barnes, our life was not an easy one, growing up in the big city of Regina, Saskatchewan, Canada. Oftentimes we didn’t know how the food was going to be put on the table.

My mom went through a lot in those years, trying to work as a nurse’s aid, manage a household of an unusually large amount of children for those parts and that time (there were 6 of us kids).

Mom as a Nurse’s Aide.

Yet through it all, my mom had an openness and kindness to other people that was an example to all of us.

She never turned down anyone when it came to raiding the refrigerator or making them feel welcome. If someone walked in at mealtime they were invited to sit with us even though the fare may not have been ample.

It was an inspiration to me!

This little anecdote reiterates the value of an Open Heart, Open Home mentality and what an example we can be in this realm for our children.

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From Emilie Barnes:Simple Secrets to a Beautiful Home: Creating a Place You and Your Family Will Love

The “parlor” was tiny, just an extra room behind the store. But the tablecloth was spotless, the candles were glowing, the flowers were bright, the tea was fragrant. Most of all, the smile was genuine and welcoming whenever ever my mother invited people to “come on back for a cup of tea.”

How often I heard her say those words when I was growing up. And how little I realized the mark they would make on me.

Those were hard years after my father died, when Mama and I shared three rooms behind her little dress shop.

Mama waited on the customers, did alterations, and worked on the books until late at night. I kept house – planning and shopping for meals, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry – while going to school and learning the dress business as well.

Sometimes I felt like Cinderella – work, work, work. And the little girl in me longed for a Prince Charming to carry me away to his castle. There I would preside over a grand and immaculate household, waited on hand and foot by attentive servants. I would wear gorgeous dresses and entertain kings and queens who marveled at my beauty and my wisdom as they lavished me with gifts.

But in the meantime, of course, I had work to do.

And although I didn’t know it, I was already receiving a gift more precious than any dream castle could be. For unlike Cinderella, I lived with a loving mother who understood the true meaning of sharing and of joy – a mother who brightened people’s lives with her gift of hospitality.

Our customers quickly learned that Mama offered a sympathetic ear as well as elegant clothes and impeccable service. Often they ended up sharing their hurts and problems with her. And then, inevitably, would come the invitation: “Let me make you a cup of tea.”

She would usher our guests back to our main room, which served as a living room by day and a bedroom by night.

Quickly a fresh cloth was slipped on the table, a candle lit, fresh flowers set out if possible, and the teapot heated. If we had them, she would pull out cookies or a loaf of banana bread.

There was never anything fancy, but the gift of her caring warmed many a heart on a cold night.

And Mama didn’t limit her hospitality to just our guests. On rainy days I often came home from school to a hot baked potato, fresh from the oven. Even with her heavy workload, Mama would take the time to make this little Cinderella feel like a queen.

My mother’s willingness to open her life to others – to share her home, her food, and her love – was truly a royal gift.

She passed it along to me, and I have the privilege of passing it on to others. What a joy to be part of the warmth and beauty of hospitality!

 

“Hospitality is so much more than entertaining-so much more than menus and decorating and putting on a show. To me, it means organizing my life in such a way that there’s always room for one more, always an extra place at the table or an extra pillow and blanket, always a welcome for those who need a listening ear. It means setting aside time for planned camaraderie and setting aside lesser priorities for impromptu gatherings.” -Emilie Barnes. Simple Secrets to a Beautiful Home

 

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Drawn from Archbishop Sheen’s bestselling books, these 28 reflections will lead you day by day through the Advent season. Eloquent quotes are paired with beautiful Scriptures on the themes of the season―patience, waiting, gift, hope, humility, joy―and more. Spend a few quiet moments of each day with one of the 20th century’s greatest preachers, preparing your heart to receive the Savior of the world…

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Prayers for use by the laity in waging spiritual warfare from the public domain and the Church’s treasury. The book has an imprimatur from the Archdiocese of Denver.

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The Wife as the Friend of the Poor

14 Monday Sep 2020

Posted by Leanevdp in Hospitality, True Womanhood, A book of Instruction for Women of the World, Rev. Bernard O'Reilly, L.D., 1893

≈ 2 Comments

From True Womanhood by Rev. Bernard O’Reilly, 1894

So pass we now to that dear function of home-life in the good old Catholic times. And connecting here hospitality toward the poor with almsgiving, let us see what was in that respect the spirit of the ages of faith.

“Padua,” Digby informs us, “had forty-five houses for the entertainment of poor strangers; in Venice all comers were entertained by many Doges; and, above all, say the old Italians, Vicenza was distinguished for its munificence toward needy strangers.

At Venice, the senators who presided over the public administration were so hospitable that the whole city resembled a hotel for guests and a common home for all strangers coming to it.

At Cesena every one used to dispute for the honor of receiving the stranger, till, to obviate such quarrels, the pillar was erected; having a ring for each noble family, so that to whichever the stranger on arriving fastened his horse, to that family was he to repair.

‘Receive kindly whoever comes says St. Francis in his rule,—the spirit of which ruled many castles as well as cloisters—’ all, whether friend or foe, thief or robber.’

We read, indeed, of one proud castle standing near the road, over the portal of which the knight who built it, through the sole motive of vanity, caused lines to be inscribed . . . intending to signify that no one should be received but knights, philosophers, or clerks, or noble ladies.

But the ancient legend states that by a terrible vision this knight was converted, and so delivered from his former error that he resolved thenceforth to entertain rather the poor, effacing that inscription and substituting for it words which signified that the naked and poor, the sick and infirm, and the exile and the pilgrim, would be thenceforth his guests.”

In Brittany a most beautiful custom still exists, in spite of modern legislation, which tends to forbid almsgiving of every kind, and to prevent the poor, even when they have a hovel of their own, from leaving it and making their dire need known to their neighbors.

The day following marriage is “the day of the poor.” They troop from every side to the door of the happy pair, and find tables spread for them in the vast hall of the nobleman, when the bridegroom is such, or on the greensward when he is of inferior degree.

The tables for the men are set on one side, those for the women on the other, the bridegroom waiting on the former, and the bride attending to the comfort of those of her own sex.

When they have had their fill, all dance together, and then take their leave, pouring blessings on their kind entertainers.

Surely such blessings and the heartfelt wishes and prayers of the poor must be more profitable to young people entering on the married state and its doubtful fortunes, than the idle congratulations of a fashionable throng, and the selfish modern custom of hastening from the foot of the altar to the railway train or steamboat, in order to escape from the irksome duty of receiving friends or feasting the poor.

If from Brittany you cross in imagination the broad expanse of sea which separates the westernmost shores of France from Spain, you will find among another proud and ancient race, the Basques, with a faith by no means less deep than that of the Bretons, Catholic notions about poverty and almsgiving which are full of eloquent meaning.

Land at any point of that rock-bound shore, in any one of the fishing towns and villages so famous all through Christian history, and you will see how the few native poor, in a country where nobody is ever seen idle, are treated with a sovereign respect and tenderness.

A recent traveler landing at the little town of Elanchove—which clings with its one street to the almost perpendicular face of a mountain two thousand feet high—saw, as he toiled up that ladder-like street, “a poor old woman all bent double with age standing at a door and asking for alms.

A charming young married woman, her mouth all wreathed with smiles, hastened to come out. I saw her take from her pocket a small brass coin, kiss it, and then give it to the old woman.

The latter took the alms, made with it very devoutly the sign of the cross on herself, and then kissed it in her turn.

Such is the custom throughout the Basque country, and does it not add a touching grace to charity?”

Such noble and touching customs as this are not, however, confined to Biscay or to Northern Spain; they are everywhere characteristic of the Spanish Catholic. The lofty spirit of self-respect which is the soul of the Spaniard, is shown in the reverence with which he treats the poor, whom word or look of his will never humble; but as his faith teaches him to consider Christ himself present in the person of the beggar or of the sick man, his respect for them becomes downright and heartfelt veneration.

It will cheer and enlighten us to gather some of these choice pearls of Spanish custom to deck our own crown of merit withal.

“Cheating and extortion seem incompatible with the Spanish character. Even the poorest peasant who has shown us our way, and who has walked a considerable distance to do so, has invariably refused to receive any thing for his services; yet all are most willing and anxious to help strangers.

The same liberal spirit seems to breathe through everything, and was equally shown at our little posada (inn) at Elche, . . . where a number of maimed, blind, and halt collected daily to receive the broken viands from the table-d’hote, which the mistress distributed to them, and in the delicate blacksmith’s wife opposite, who keeps two lamps burning nightly at her own expense before the little shrine of ‘Our Lady of the Unprotected’ in her balcony.

The temporal works of mercy—to give bread to the hungry, and drink to the thirsty, to take care of the sick, to visit prisoners, and to bury the dead, these are the common duties which none shrink from.”

As I write, a handsome, dark-eyed brown boy in rags, who looks as if he had stepped out of one of Murillo’s pictures, is leaning against the opposite wall in the moonlight, watching a shrine of the Virgin.

It is a picture typical of Spain, ruined and superstitious, but still most beautiful— and so is the cry of the watchman which is ringing through the silent air, ‘Ave, Maria Santissima! It is a quarter to twelve o’clock!'”

Ah, give us back this superstition,—this living faith rather, which built up Spain and Portugal till they were the wonder of Christendom.

The ruin of the Peninsula is coeval, step by step, with the decline of that glorious spirit of “superstition.” But we can pardon this perversion of judgment in a Protestant who has the eye to see and the heart to appreciate so much that is beautiful in Catholic customs.

It is well known that from time immemorial the sovereigns of Spain visit the hospitals nearest to the royal residence once at least every year. The rule is to go there with the entire court.

On entering the sick ward royalty at once goes to the nearest bed and humbly kisses the hand of the poor patient. Then sovereigns and courtiers wait on the sick, performing in their behalf the most menial services, and addressing the sufferers with as much reverence as if they beheld the God of Calvary or the Divine Babe of Bethlehem visibly present in every sick-bed.

 
Let us make a home that is warm and welcoming, comfortable and freeing – a place where we can express the beauty of our Faith and nurture relationships with people we love. Let us build a home that reflects our personalities and renews our souls. Today, do something special to show your loved ones you care. Put a tablecloth on the table, light a candle, bake a cake, buy some flowers to grace your table….It doesn’t have to be huge…just something to lighten the burdens of the day and to bring a smile to those who cross your threshold.
A sermon for you today as you fold laundry, wash dishes, crochet that gift….. 🙂
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The Spirit of the Kitchen – Emilie Barnes

17 Monday Sep 2018

Posted by Leanevdp in by Emilie Barnes, Hospitality

≈ 2 Comments

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From Emilie Barnes:Simple Secrets to a Beautiful Home: Creating a Place You and Your Family Will Love

“No matter where I serve my guests, it seems they like my kitchen best.”

That little painted plaque in my kitchen is more than just a cute saying for the wall. It’s the way I’ve felt all my life. Wherever I’ve lived, the kitchen has always seemed to be the place where warmth and love reign.

Family and friends are drawn there like chickens to their roosts. Of all the rooms in our home, the kitchen is the place of comfort, the preferred gathering place for shared conversations and the teamwork of preparing good meals for and with each other.

For me as a young girl, the kitchen was always where I wanted to be – sitting on the countertop as ingredients flew everywhere, tantalizing aromas floated through the air, and meals and memories were created.

After my father died and my mother and I took up quarters in three rooms behind her little dress shop, the kitchen was still the center of warmth.

I remember so many times when Mama welcomed me home with a baked potato, hot cocoa, cinnamon apples, or popovers in winter; popsicles or ice cold lemonade in summer.

All these were expressions of love, and they all came from the kitchen.

The Heart of the Home

Even today, the kitchen feels like the heart of home to me. The smell of garlic and onions being sautéed in butter draws me to the kitchen. Coffee, brewing fresh in the pot, lifts and warms my heart.

I love to bend over a bubbling pot of soup or gaze out the window while quietly bringing order to my countertops. And I love to smile at all the photographs of family and friends that smile back at me from the refrigerator door.

My kitchen is filled with heart. My pots hang on hooks above the stove the way my dad’s pots did in his commercial kitchens. Plants line the windowsill, including a few pots of herbs to snip when needed. A crock holds my whips, wooden spoons, and spatulas in a space-saving and attractive bouquet. A collection of special plaques and pictures from friends and family decorates my “love wall” at one end of the room.

Above all, make your kitchen a room you enjoy and feel good in.

home

 

“A special time to show your husband he is very important in your life is when he comes home from work. Make it a pleasant time for him. Put the housework aside. Greet him with a smile. Have his favorite beverage ready for him. If he wishes to talk, listen attentively. If he doesn’t, give him space to unwind. Such a greeting will make an amazing difference in his life.This may not always be possible with many little ones, but make it happen as often as you can. Your thoughtful consideration for his welfare will make him feel respected and loved.” -Paraphrased from Fascinating Womanhood

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Here are the songs they sang for feasts and holidays, as well as Maria s personal recipes for traditional holiday foods. Here are stories and games to delight your children, and countless other ways to turn events such as anniversaries, baptisms, graduations, birthdays, wedding receptions, and even funerals into feasts celebrated in the Lord.

Most people only know the young Maria from The Sound of Music; few realize that in subsequent years, as a pious wife and a seasoned Catholic mother, Maria gave herself unreservedly to keeping her family Catholic by observing in her home the many feasts of the Church s liturgical year, with poems and prayers, food and fun, and so much more!

With the help of Maria von Trapp, you, too, can provide Christian structure and vibrancy to your home. Soon your home will be a warm and loving place, an earthly reflection of our eternal home.

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The Spirit of Hospitality – Emilie Barnes

09 Monday Jul 2018

Posted by Leanevdp in by Emilie Barnes, Hospitality, Virtues

≈ 2 Comments

The following little story about the Gift of Hospitality struck a chord with me.

Like Emilie Barnes, our life was not an easy one, growing up in the big city of Regina, Saskatchewan, Canada. Oftentimes we didn’t know how the food was going to be put on the table.

My mom went through a lot in those years, trying to work as a nurse’s aid, manage a household of an unusually large amount of children for those parts and that time (there were 6 of us kids).

Yet through it all, my mom had an openness and kindness to other people that was an example to all of us.

She never turned down anyone when it came to raiding the refrigerator or making them feel welcome. If someone walked in at mealtime they were invited to sit with us even though the fare may not have been ample.

It was an inspiration to me!

This little anecdote reiterates the value of an Open Heart, Open Home mentality and what an example we can be in this realm for our children.

tumblr_nnh8hjPq6g1r9qhhio1_500

From Emilie Barnes:Simple Secrets to a Beautiful Home: Creating a Place You and Your Family Will Love

The “parlor” was tiny, just an extra room behind the store. But the tablecloth was spotless, the candles were glowing, the flowers were bright, the tea was fragrant. Most of all, the smile was genuine and welcoming whenever ever my mother invited people to “come on back for a cup of tea.”

How often I heard her say those words when I was growing up. And how little I realized the mark they would make on me.

Those were hard years after my father died, when Mama and I shared three rooms behind her little dress shop.

Mama waited on the customers, did alterations, and worked on the books until late at night. I kept house – planning and shopping for meals, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry – while going to school and learning the dress business as well.

Sometimes I felt like Cinderella – work, work, work. And the little girl in me longed for a Prince Charming to carry me away to his castle. There I would preside over a grand and immaculate household, waited on hand and foot by attentive servants. I would wear gorgeous dresses and entertain kings and queens who marveled at my beauty and my wisdom as they lavished me with gifts.

But in the meantime, of course, I had work to do.

And although I didn’t know it, I was already receiving a gift more precious than any dream castle could be. For unlike Cinderella, I lived with a loving mother who understood the true meaning of sharing and of joy – a mother who brightened people’s lives with her gift of hospitality.

Our customers quickly learned that Mama offered a sympathetic ear as well as elegant clothes and impeccable service. Often they ended up sharing their hurts and problems with her. And then, inevitably, would come the invitation: “Let me make you a cup of tea.”

She would usher our guests back to our main room, which served as a living room by day and a bedroom by night.

Quickly a fresh cloth was slipped on the table, a candle lit, fresh flowers set out if possible, and the teapot heated. If we had them, she would pull out cookies or a loaf of banana bread.

There was never anything fancy, but the gift of her caring warmed many a heart on a cold night.

And Mama didn’t limit her hospitality to just our guests. On rainy days I often came home from school to a hot baked potato, fresh from the oven. Even with her heavy workload, Mama would take the time to make this little Cinderella feel like a queen.

My mother’s willingness to open her life to others – to share her home, her food, and her love – was truly a royal gift.

She passed it along to me, and I have the privilege of passing it on to others. What a joy to be part of the warmth and beauty of hospitality!

image

“Hospitality is so much more than entertaining-so much more than menus and decorating and putting on a show. To me, it means organizing my life in such a way that there’s always room for one more, always an extra place at the table or an extra pillow and blanket, always a welcome for those who need a listening ear. It means setting aside time for planned camaraderie and setting aside lesser priorities for impromptu gatherings.” -Emilie Barnes. Simple Secrets to a Beautiful Home

IMG_0514

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Available here.


This post contains affiliate links. Thank you kindly for your support.

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The Wife as the Friend of the Poor

10 Friday Nov 2017

Posted by Leanevdp in Hospitality, True Womanhood, A book of Instruction for Women of the World, Rev. Bernard O'Reilly, L.D., 1893

≈ 1 Comment

From True Womanhood by Rev. Bernard O’Reilly, 1894

So pass we now to that dear function of home-life in the good old Catholic times. And connecting here hospitality toward the poor with almsgiving, let us see what was in that respect the spirit of the ages of faith.

“Padua,” Digby informs us, “had forty-five houses for the entertainment of poor strangers; in Venice all comers were entertained by many Doges; and, above all, say the old Italians, Vicenza was distinguished for its munificence toward needy strangers.

At Venice, the senators who presided over the public administration were so hospitable that the whole city resembled a hotel for guests and a common home for all strangers coming to it.

At Cesena every one used to dispute for the honor of receiving the stranger, till, to obviate such quarrels, the pillar was erected; having a ring for each noble family, so that to whichever the stranger on arriving fastened his horse, to that family was he to repair.

‘Receive kindly whoever comes says St. Francis in his rule,—the spirit of which ruled many castles as well as cloisters—’ all, whether friend or foe, thief or robber.’

We read, indeed, of one proud castle standing near the road, over the portal of which the knight who built it, through the sole motive of vanity, caused lines to be inscribed . . . intending to signify that no one should be received but knights, philosophers, or clerks, or noble ladies.

But the ancient legend states that by a terrible vision this knight was converted, and so delivered from his former error that he resolved thenceforth to entertain rather the poor, effacing that inscription and substituting for it words which signified that the naked and poor, the sick and infirm, and the exile and the pilgrim, would be thenceforth his guests.”

In Brittany a most beautiful custom still exists, in spite of modern legislation, which tends to forbid almsgiving of every kind, and to prevent the poor, even when they have a hovel of their own, from leaving it and making their dire need known to their neighbors.

The day following marriage is “the day of the poor.” They troop from every side to the door of the happy pair, and find tables spread for them in the vast hall of the nobleman, when the bridegroom is such, or on the greensward when he is of inferior degree.

The tables for the men are set on one side, those for the women on the other, the bridegroom waiting on the former, and the bride attending to the comfort of those of her own sex.

When they have had their fill, all dance together, and then take their leave, pouring blessings on their kind entertainers.

Surely such blessings and the heartfelt wishes and prayers of the poor must be more profitable to young people entering on the married state and its doubtful fortunes, than the idle congratulations of a fashionable throng, and the selfish modern custom of hastening from the foot of the altar to the railway train or steamboat, in order to escape from the irksome duty of receiving friends or feasting the poor.

If from Brittany you cross in imagination the broad expanse of sea which separates the westernmost shores of France from Spain, you will find among another proud and ancient race, the Basques, with a faith by no means less deep than that of the Bretons, Catholic notions about poverty and almsgiving which are full of eloquent meaning.

Land at any point of that rock-bound shore, in any one of the fishing towns and villages so famous all through Christian history, and you will see how the few native poor, in a country where nobody is ever seen idle, are treated with a sovereign respect and tenderness.

A recent traveler landing at the little town of Elanchove—which clings with its one street to the almost perpendicular face of a mountain two thousand feet high—saw, as he toiled up that ladder-like street, “a poor old woman all bent double with age standing at a door and asking for alms.

A charming young married woman, her mouth all wreathed with smiles, hastened to come out. I saw her take from her pocket a small brass coin, kiss it, and then give it to the old woman.

The latter took the alms, made with it very devoutly the sign of the cross on herself, and then kissed it in her turn.

Such is the custom throughout the Basque country, and does it not add a touching grace to charity?”

Such noble and touching customs as this are not, however, confined to Biscay or to Northern Spain; they are everywhere characteristic of the Spanish Catholic. The lofty spirit of self-respect which is the soul of the Spaniard, is shown in the reverence with which he treats the poor, whom word or look of his will never humble; but as his faith teaches him to consider Christ himself present in the person of the beggar or of the sick man, his respect for them becomes downright and heartfelt veneration.

It will cheer and enlighten us to gather some of these choice pearls of Spanish custom to deck our own crown of merit withal.

“Cheating and extortion seem incompatible with the Spanish character. Even the poorest peasant who has shown us our way, and who has walked a considerable distance to do so, has invariably refused to receive any thing for his services; yet all are most willing and anxious to help strangers.

The same liberal spirit seems to breathe through everything, and was equally shown at our little posada (inn) at Elche, . . . where a number of maimed, blind, and halt collected daily to receive the broken viands from the table-d’hote, which the mistress distributed to them, and in the delicate blacksmith’s wife opposite, who keeps two lamps burning nightly at her own expense before the little shrine of ‘Our Lady of the Unprotected’ in her balcony.

The temporal works of mercy—to give bread to the hungry, and drink to the thirsty, to take care of the sick, to visit prisoners, and to bury the dead, these are the common duties which none shrink from.”

As I write, a handsome, dark-eyed brown boy in rags, who looks as if he had stepped out of one of Murillo’s pictures, is leaning against the opposite wall in the moonlight, watching a shrine of the Virgin.

It is a picture typical of Spain, ruined and superstitious, but still most beautiful— and so is the cry of the watchman which is ringing through the silent air, ‘Ave, Maria Santissima! It is a quarter to twelve o’clock!'”

Ah, give us back this superstition,—this living faith rather, which built up Spain and Portugal till they were the wonder of Christendom.

The ruin of the Peninsula is coeval, step by step, with the decline of that glorious spirit of “superstition.” But we can pardon this perversion of judgment in a Protestant who has the eye to see and the heart to appreciate so much that is beautiful in Catholic customs.

It is well known that from time immemorial the sovereigns of Spain visit the hospitals nearest to the royal residence once at least every year. The rule is to go there with the entire court.

On entering the sick ward royalty at once goes to the nearest bed and humbly kisses the hand of the poor patient. Then sovereigns and courtiers wait on the sick, performing in their behalf the most menial services, and addressing the sufferers with as much reverence as if they beheld the God of Calvary or the Divine Babe of Bethlehem visibly present in every sick-bed.

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Let us make a home that is warm and welcoming, comfortable and freeing – a place where we can express the beauty of our Faith and nurture relationships with people we love. Let us build a home that reflects our personalities and renews our souls. Today, do something special to show your loved ones you care. Put a tablecloth on the table, light a candle, bake a cake, buy some flowers to grace your table….It doesn’t have to be huge…just something to lighten the burdens of the day and to bring a smile to those who cross your threshold.
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A sermon for you today as you fold laundry, wash dishes, crochet that gift….. 🙂
An amazing victory! A recount of the battle of Belgrade & St John Capistrano….

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The Wife, The Dispenser of Hospitality

05 Tuesday Sep 2017

Posted by Leanevdp in Hospitality, True Womanhood, A book of Instruction for Women of the World, Rev. Bernard O'Reilly, L.D., 1893

≈ 1 Comment

From True Womanhood, Rev. Bernard O’Reilly, 1893

To the wife’s stewardship belongs also the discharge of a most important, not to say most sacred duty—that of hospitality. It is one of the chief functions of the divine virtue of charity.

Of its nature, its necessity, and its importance we do not wish to discourse here. Few are the homes and the hearts to which hospitality is a stranger. Those to which this book may reach will easily understand what the word means without either definition or description. We can, therefore, convey our instruction by the simplest method. Whoever is received into your home as a guest—precisely because he is your guest—forget everything else to make his stay delightful.

It matters little whether persons thus hospitably received may or may not appreciate your generosity, your cordiality, and that true warmth of a welcome like yours, inspired by Christian motives much more than by worldly reasons; it matters much for you that none should ever enter your home without finding it a true Christian home, or should leave it without taking away with them the pleasant memory of their stay and a grateful recollection of you and yours.

Doubtless some will be found whom no courtesy, no kindness, no warmth of hospitality can change from what they are,—little-minded, narrow-hearted, selfish, cold, and unable to judge the conduct of others by any other standard than their own low thoughts and sentiments.

They are only like bats entering a banquet-hall by one window and passing out at the opposite, after having fluttered blindly about the lights, or clung for a few instants to the walls or the ceiling. Let them come and let them go. The social and spiritual atmosphere of the place is not for them.

Nor must you complain of the number. It is wonderful how much place a large-hearted woman can find for her company, even in a very small house!

A hospitable spirit can do wonders in its way: it can make the water on the board more delicious than the wines of Portugal, Spain, or France or Italy; it can make the bread which it places before stranger or friend as sweet as the food of the gods; it can multiply its own scanty stores—as the Master did with the loaves in the wilderness.

For God’s blessing is with the hospitable soul to increase, to multiply, and to sweeten; to fill all who sit at her board with plenty, with joy, with thanksgiving.

“There is,” says Digby, “a castle on the Loire held by a lady of ascetic piety and of noble fame, in the latest pages of French heroic annals. There one of my friends, received to hospitality, finding many guests, supposed himself surrounded by men of illustrious condition, till he was informed that they were all persons reduced to poverty, whose title to familiarity under that roof was founded precisely on their indigence and misfortunes.”

Ah, noble France, how many other homes along the Loire, the Mayenne, the Sarthe, and the Somme do we not know which are always open to the stranger and the pilgrim from other lands, while their generous masters and mistresses deem every sacrifice a blessing, because performed for Christ present in the guest of one day, or one week, or one month!

A man does not expect his wife to neglect important duty in his behalf. He is aware of the demands of her life and wants her to give each responsibility the attention it requires. He does not want his children to suffer neglect. And he knows she is entitled to other interests and diversions. But, he doesn’t want to be less important. And he doesn’t want to be regarded as a convenience, a paycheck, an escort, a social asset, a ticket to security. He would like to feel that she married him for him, and not as a means of filling her needs or reaching her objectives. -Helen Andelin, Fascinating Womanhood

Make a statement with this lovely and graceful “Autumn Queen” handcrafted apron….fully lined….made with care. Aprons tell a beautiful story…..a story of love and sacrifice….of baking bread and mopping floors, of planting seeds and household chores. Sadly, many women have tossed the aprons aside and donned their business attire. Wear your apron with joy….it is a symbol of Femininity….”Finer” Femininity!

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The Meaning of Home

27 Thursday Jul 2017

Posted by Leanevdp in Family Life, Hospitality

≈ 4 Comments

Ever since we have been married, we have tried to live an “Open Heart, Open Home” mentality. We have been blessed many times over for it.

We like to share our home, our family, with others who are seeking a little taste of “large (rather raucous) family life”. We play games, listen to music, eat popcorn, dance and just enjoy one another.img_0182

The house is not always clean. My cupboards need help. If I waited to invite people over when the house is perfect….well, you know the end of that story. So I try not to sweat the small stuff and have learned to humbly admit I haven’t got it all together in every aspect of my housecleaning abilities. Nobody seems to mind. They keep coming back! 🙂

My mom has reminded me through the years that people are more important than things. It’s a good lesson to learn.

It is a beautiful thing to be able to take part in the recreation and the friends that our kids like to have around. It is family-friendly activities and we, as parents, watch over and take part in the fun!

I just mentioned to my daughter, Rosie, who is still at home, that it is quite amazing that my newly married daughter and son-in-law’s favorite pastime is to come over to Mom and Dad’s and play board games! It makes me smile. 🙂

From Emilie Barnes:Simple Secrets to a Beautiful Home: Creating a Place You and Your Family Will Love

The Meaning of Home

Why is a “welcome home” lifestyle so important?

I truly believe we all need a spiritual center, a place where we belong. A place where we can go to unwind and regroup and get in touch with who we truly are… and then reach out to share with others.

That doesn’t necessarily mean a physical location.

Home is as much a state of the heart and spirit as it is a specific place.

Many a person living on the road has learned to “make herself at home” in hotel rooms, other people’s houses, or wherever she finds herself.

And yet… just as our spirits require physical bodies to do God’s work here on earth, most of us need a physical place we can call home.

And we have the privilege of making the place where we live into a welcoming refuge for ourselves and others-a place where simplicity and beauty can find a foothold in our lives. This kind of home doesn’t take a lot of money or even a lot of time. (I’ve seen it done by stay-at-home moms and high-placed executives and even a just-graduated bachelor or two.)

It doesn’t require a professional’s touch in decorating or cooking or home maintenance.

It can certainly be clone without a maid.

What a welcoming home does require is a caring and willing spirit-a determination to think beyond bare-bones necessities and to make room in our lives and schedules and budgets for what pleases the senses and enriches the soul.

Most of all, it requires an “I can” attitude, a confidence that we have something to share and the ability to share it.

Besides, a refuge is not a hole where you disappear to eat and sleep and then emerge to go about the business of life.

A welcoming home is where real life happens.

It’s where personalities are nurtured, where growth is stimulated, where people feel free not only to be themselves but also to develop their best selves.

That caring, nurturing quality-not the absence of noise or strife-is what makes a home a refuge.

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Learn to forgive, and learn to apologize. Holding on to “stuff” even for a few hours is destructive. It is like having poison in your system for just a short time; you think you are teaching your spouse a lesson, but, in truth, you are weakening the soul of your marriage. Just forgive and move on. For many, saying I’m sorry is difficult. Just get over it and say the words and say them in a meaningful way. -No Greater Joy, Artist: Loui Jover

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 I have made The Catholic Young Lady’s Maglet available to pre-order. I will be sending out the books by November 20th and they may be sold out soon after so please pre-order now if you would like this for Christmas! Link is here.

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Making the Most of Mealtimes

28 Friday Oct 2016

Posted by Leanevdp in by Emilie Barnes, Health and Wellness, Hospitality

≈ 2 Comments

 

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from The Spirit of Loveliness by Emilie Barnes

Much of our lifetime is spent in a food related atmosphere. If you are a woman forty-five years or older, you’ve already spent over fifty thousand hours in the kitchen and eaten over fifty thousand meals!

Since we spend so much of our lives eating, preparing to eat, and cleaning up after ourselves, shouldn’t we put some effort and attention into making mealtimes some of the most pleasurable and memorable parts of our lives?

What makes a memorable meal?

The recipe for such a time involves four ingredients:

The Setting

The attractive way you set the table sets the tone for a meal and can convey affection, warmth, and caring. The simple way the napkin is fluffed up in the glass, folded to make a flower, or creatively arranged in a napkin ring can speak your love and concern. The garnish of parsley on the platter of roast chicken or a wedge of lemon in the glass of water say, “I care enough to do the little bit it takes to be above average.” A floral sheet made into a unique tablecloth with matching napkins can be creative and inexpensive.

Centerpieces are great for establishing a mood. But a centerpiece can be so much more than a case of chrysanthemums plopped in the middle of a table. An autumn table lined down the middle with apples, pears, grapes, winter squash and Indian corn smiles a beautiful welcome. A swatch of pine twinkling with tiny white lights and festive with tiny wooden toys sets a Christmassy mood. Individual vases holding single blooms can freshen up individual place settings. And candles are always wonderful. Use them liberally to create the spirit of warmth at mealtime.

The Food

Obviously, food takes the starring role at any meal. The warm, caring spirit of the kitchen extends to providing food that is both delicious and healthful. The old adage, “You are what you eat” is really true. When we eat right, we look better and feel better. Our mental and physical health improves. We have more energy and endurance to carry out the task of loving others.

Given the fact that healthy eating is so important, isn’t it great that healthy meals can also taste wonderful? Many of the most healthy foods – fruits and vegetables, especially – are also the most pleasing to the eye. Learning to eat a wholesome variety of foods can be a delicious adventure that adds another exciting dimension to the spirit of the kitchen.

When you are planning your meals, doing your shopping, or just puttering in the kitchen, don’t forget to take your nose into account! Aromas are memory triggers; they invoke recollections of the past happiness. You can build those kinds of memories through the wonderful aromas of the kitchen. The smell of garlic, curry, cinnamon, fresh bread, or coffee can combine with wonderful tastes and warm feelings to instill the spirit of the kitchen deep in the souls of your family, your guests, and you.

The Fellowship

Mealtime is traditionally a time for family and guests to gather and share their lives. But hectic schedules make home-made family meals a thing of the past for many families. It’s worth the effort to buck this trend and share a family meal. Turn off the TV, unplug the phone and sit down together for a time of fellowship and food.

Expect some resistance if your family is out of practice at fellowship. You might want to stimulate conversation with some questions such as “What is the best thing that happened to you today?” Be prepared to share, and be prepared to listen.

Mealtime is not the only opportunity for “kitchen style” fellowship, of course. Some of my most reassured conversations have happened while two of us were cooking or cleaning up together. Afterschool snacks, afternoon tea, and late-night popcorn sessions all provide safe, comfortable opportunities for sharing lives as well as sharing the spirit of the kitchen.

Some of the richest kind of kitchen fellowship comes when we extend the spirit of the kitchen to those outside our homes and families. Surely this is part of what Jesus meant when he said, “I was hungry and you fed me.” People who volunteer to cook at a soup kitchen, deliver meals on wheels, or help with an emergency food drive discover that they are richly blessed by the opportunity to share the spirit of the kitchen with someone in need.

A Peaceful Ambience

“Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting with strife” (Proverbs 17:1). That was true in Solomon’s day, and it’s especially true in today’s high-stress, stomach-churning society. Peaceful mealtimes aid both the digestion and the disposition; they are well worth the effort they take.

How can mealtimes be more related? Careful panning helps, so that dishes are ready at the same time and you don’t have to keep running to the kitchen. Food should be simple and wholesome and tailored to the needs of family and guests. (Serving spicy or difficult-to-handle food to small children, for example, just invites tension and frustration.)

Conversation can be lively and even provocative, but it’s good to postpone weighty or emotional issues for another time. Beautiful, soothing music in the background helps everyone to calm down and enjoy the meal.

Perhaps the most meaningful and effective way to bring an air of peace and grace to mealtime is to make a habit of inciting God to be present. Even a mumbled and hurried “Bless us O Lord…” helps turn our hearts in the direction of gratitude and peace. But how much better to really stop, take a quiet moment, and ask the Lord’s blessing on the meal and those gathered around the table.

May these walls be filled with laughter,   

May it reach from floor to rafter.    

May the roof keep out the rain,

May sunshine warm each windowpane.    

And may the door be open wide

To let the Good Lord’s love inside.

-Irish Blessing

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“What a majestic figure is that of the mother in the home as she fulfills her destiny at the cradle side, the nurse and teacher of her little ones! Hers is truly a task full of labor, and we should be tempted to deem her unequal to it were it not for the grace of God which is ever at hand to enlighten, direct, and sustain her in her daily anxieties and toil.” – Pope Pius XII

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The Spirit of the Kitchen – Emilie Barnes

09 Friday Sep 2016

Posted by Leanevdp in by Emilie Barnes, Hospitality

≈ 7 Comments

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From Emilie Barnes:Simple Secrets to a Beautiful Home: Creating a Place You and Your Family Will Love

“No matter where I serve my guests, it seems they like my kitchen best.”

That little painted plaque in my kitchen is more than just a cute saying for the wall. It’s the way I’ve felt all my life. Wherever I’ve lived, the kitchen has always seemed to be the place where warmth and love reign.

Family and friends are drawn there like chickens to their roosts. Of all the rooms in our home, the kitchen is the place of comfort, the preferred gathering place for shared conversations and the teamwork of preparing good meals for and with each other.

For me as a young girl, the kitchen was always where I wanted to be – sitting on the countertop as ingredients flew everywhere, tantalizing aromas floated through the air, and meals and memories were created.

After my father died and my mother and I took up quarters in three rooms behind her little dress shop, the kitchen was still the center of warmth.

I remember so many times when Mama welcomed me home with a baked potato, hot cocoa, cinnamon apples, or popovers in winter; popsicles or ice cold lemonade in summer.

All these were expressions of love, and they all came from the kitchen.

The Heart of the Home

Even today, the kitchen feels like the heart of home to me. The smell of garlic and onions being sautéed in butter draws me to the kitchen. Coffee, brewing fresh in the pot, lifts and warms my heart.

I love to bend over a bubbling pot of soup or gaze out the window while quietly bringing order to my countertops. And I love to smile at all the photographs of family and friends that smile back at me from the refrigerator door.

My kitchen is filled with heart. My pots hang on hooks above the stove the way my dad’s pots did in his commercial kitchens. Plants line the windowsill, including a few pots of herbs to snip when needed. A crock holds my whips, wooden spoons, and spatulas in a space-saving and attractive bouquet. A collection of special plaques and pictures from friends and family decorates my “love wall” at one end of the room.

Above all, make your kitchen a room you enjoy and feel good in.

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“A special time to show your husband he is very important in your life is when he comes home from work. Make it a pleasant time for him. Put the housework aside. Greet him with a smile. Have his favorite beverage ready for him. If he wishes to talk, listen attentively. If he doesn’t, give him space to unwind. Such a greeting will make an amazing difference in his life.This may not always be possible with many little ones, but make it happen as often as you can. Your thoughtful consideration for his welfare will make him feel respected and loved.” -Paraphrased from Fascinating Womanhood

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Inspire and delight your children with these lighthearted and faith-filled poems. Take a peek at Amazon here.

Don't forget to sign up for the Giveaway for my book and the bracelet! I will pull the name from the hat Tuesday, May 10th!

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