Virtue & Common Sense / She Was Contrary ~ Plain Talks on Marriage


by Fr. Fulgence Meyer, Plain Talks on Marriage

Virtue and Common Sense

From all that has been said it is readily inferred that the marriage relation, perhaps more than any other in life, enjoins upon the parties to it the observance of the wise admonition of St. Paul, which I know I am repeating at the risk of becoming monotonous: “Bear ye one another’s burdens.”

On the one hand there is no natural happiness greater and sweeter than that of married life: on the other the achievement of no other earthly happiness requires more virtue and good sense. Which of these two plays the bigger part in the pursuit of marital happiness it is hard to say.

Perhaps the burden is equally divided. Yet for myself I am inclined to believe that good sense is in a way more operative in regard to happiness in married life and, for that matter, to the proper upbringing of children than is even virtue.

This may strike some readers as surprising, to say the least, but it is nothing else than another rendering or another application of the well-known words of St. Teresa, who says that she preferred as her confessor a priest who was prudent but not holy to one who was holy but not prudent.

More marriages are wrecked because of a lack of good common sense in one or both parties than because of a lack of virtue in both or in either. Certainly, the ideal condition is to have virtue and good sense joined in amicable proportions and in a good measure in both husband and wife.

She Was Contrary

In Rome they tell the story of a couple whose marriage was stormy and, consequently, most disagreeable throughout. To the wife it finally became so unbearable that she decided to put an end to her misery by plunging from a bridge into the swollen Tiber.

Her husband, being apprised of the sad news, came to the river in search of the body. When the spot of her suicide was shown to him, he went up stream a considerable distance.

They asked him why he went up stream, since the violent current had no doubt carried his wife’s corpse far down stream. “You did not know my wife,” he said archly, and not without sarcasm; “she was always contrary; and no doubt she kept the habit of it even after her death.”

It is selfish stubbornness, as a rule, on the part of the husband or wife, or both, that wrecks many marriages which, by sensible concessions and compromises on both sides, could have been rendered exceedingly and permanently happy.

But because the partners to them have not the good sense and virtue to make the necessary concessions, estrangements and ruptures soon ensue, and before long lead to an irremediable divorce.

“One of the first essential elements in a wife is faithfulness, in the largest sense. The heart of her husband safely trusts in her. Perfect confidence is the basis of all true affection. A shadow of doubt destroys the peace of married life. A true wife, by her character and by her conduct, proves herself worthy of her husband’s trust. He has confidence in her affection; he knows that her heart is unalterably true to him.” -.J.R.Miller

We must realize that building back to traditional values starts, first, in ourselves and in our homes. Which, in turn, will affect our communities and society in general. And our dress is a powerful means to do just that! It IS like a billboard saying, “There is still something beautiful, noble and good in this world, and it is worth living for.”



ST. BENEDICT BRACELETS! Spiritual Protection

Available here.

One of the powerful weapons in spiritual combat is the St. Benedict medal. Used for centuries, this medal has been associated with many miracles, as well as with powers of exorcism.

St. Benedict medals are used in many ways, but always as a protection against evil. Some people bury them in the foundations of new buildings to keep them free from evil influences, while others attach them to rosaries or hang them on the wall in their homes. But the most common way to use the St. Benedict medal is to wear it. The medal can be worn by itself or embedded in a crucifix.

Regardless of how it is used, the medal should always be blessed with the special St. Benedict blessing. While, in former times, only Benedictines could bless the medal, now any priest can.

Plain Talks on Marriage

“A good Catholic man loves his wife not only in the first period of marriage, when she is young, beautiful, sprightly, vivacious and generally charming, and when their union still has the spice of novelty and freshness: but he will love her as much or even more as years wear on.”
—Fr. Fulgence Meyer, OFM

Published in the 1920s, this timeless book offers practical counsel and wisdom relevant for every Catholic married couple and those preparing for this great sacrament. Specifically, this book addresses how to form a truly Catholic home, the challenges and various sins that destroy marital love, and above all, how spousal love ought to flourish.

With simplicity and singleness of purpose, Plain Talks’ intimate and reverent style will give you frank, illuminating, and correct answers to the questions that perplex you. Those who read this book will become better spouses and parents.

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